


An Ordinary Life

by blueleviathan



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, References of Reincarnation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-25
Updated: 2015-07-01
Packaged: 2018-03-19 15:26:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 28,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3614910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueleviathan/pseuds/blueleviathan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Erwin is a widowed lawyer. His father-in-law, Commissioner Keith Shadis, asks him to temporarily house a young man being reinstated with the police force after years on undercover assignment.</p>
<p>Erwin isn't sure what to think when he meets Levi for the first time, except that the connection between them is instant. </p>
<p>Arc one loosely inspired by Infernal Affairs. Warnings to change as chapters progress.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Erwin sips his tea slowly and glances down at his Omega watch. The waitress comes over and smiles demurely at him. 

"Still waiting, sir?"

He gives her a tight smile. "Yes, sorry. He should be arriving shortly."

She nods and lingers a bit, eyes wandering down to his deposition notes on the table.

"Do you work close by? I've seen you here a few times during my shift."

"My office is actually downtown," he answers conversationally. "My father-in-law likes to meet here."

"Oh," she says, smile faltering a bit as her eyes wander to his left hand. He had stopped wearing his ring years ago.

Keith makes an entrance at that moment, shucking off his coat and pulling at his scarf as he makes his way towards Erwin.

Erwin stands. "Keith, good to see you."

Keith gives him a small smile and claps him on the arm a few times in greeting. He looked exhausted.

"Sorry I'm late again, seems you're always waiting for me."

"You're a man of importance."

"You'd be surprised at the kinds of things I have to do nowadays," he grunts, taking a seat.

"Tea for you as well, sir?" The waitress puts down a menu in front of him.

"Yes, thank you."

Erwin removes his notepad from the table and loosens his tie.

"How have you been, Erwin?" Shadis asks, looking him over.

"Not bad. Busy," he answers, aware of the somber way the older man looked at him.

Even now, six years after his wife's death, Keith still had a sad manner about him whenever he saw Erwin. Erwin supposes it's because he's a living reminder of the life his daughter could've had. Though blood ties no longer bound them, Keith insisted they continue to meet regularly like any family would. They met at his favorite ramen place from time to time like this. It was an enduring bond they shared, both being widowed. 

"Yourself?" Erwin asks, deflecting the conservation away from him.

"Busier than usual."

The waitress comes back to take their order. Keith gets the same bowl of ramen every time. 

"How so?" Erwin asks when she leaves, taking another sip of tea. 

Shadis leans back a bit, turning his cup absently.

"I'm housing a young man right now. He was on assignment for me for many years and is being reinstated with the police force. He's taking some time off from the field."

Erwin's lips pause against the rim of the cup. He immediately knows Shadis planted him as a mole. His father-in-law was the police commissioner for the prefecture.

Shadis sighs a bit. "This lieutenant was our top recruit out of university. He's... changed shall we say. I thought it'd be nice if he stayed with you for a while."

Erwin keeps his face neutral as he puts down his cup.

"Trust me, I wouldn't be asking you unless I was out of choices. Tell me if it's too much of a burden."

"It's fine," Erwin answers cautiously. "I work long hours, so I'm not home much anyways. What's your reasoning?"

"I'll be away for a few days on business. You're the only one I can trust to keep him in good hands for the time being. You have... a certain way with people. 

Besides, it's not healthy for him to see my old face all day long. Once he's cleared to be back in the field, I'll arrange a place for him."

Erwin isn't sure how to take the information. There was more Keith wasn't telling him, but the other man always did things intentionally. He was choosing to house this lieutenant directly and was now seeking someone outside of the force in his absence. That meant no one knew about him yet and Shadis wanted it that way.

"Do you fear an informant is hidden within the police force?"

Shadis suddenly becomes very still and looks at Erwin long and hard. He settles into his seat more, expression softening as he taps the side of the cup.

"I suppose there's a reason the guys down at the precinct call you a killer."

"My apologies, I don't mean to pry. I will do this for you, but would rather know now rather than later what type of measures I need to take."

Keith takes a green business card out of his jacket and slides it to him. "I guess you've already read between the lines. It makes things easier for me. Aside from myself, this person was the lieutenant's only contact for many years."

Erwin doesn't need to read the card to know who it is. 

"I've worked with Hange before. I hadn't known her connection to this case."

"She'll tell you what you need to know, Erwin. Expect a call from her soon."

 

Shadis dies in the line of duty a few days later. 

 

Erwin sees him during the funeral. Out of the sea of officers in formation, he's the only one without a uniform that salutes Shadis. Erwin scans the crowd to see if anyone else has taken notice. A blonde female officer has her head turned towards him. 

Erwin notes how he doesn't move for the rest of the eulogy, black hair obscuring his face as he sits bent over with his elbows on his knees. 

He drives his brother-in-law and wife Marie back to Shadis's house after the private burial. Their family home would now be passed to Nile's name.

"I'll take care of everything," Erwin assures him as they get out of the car. 

Nile just nods his head, sunset casting dark shadows over his face. He watches as Nile is pulled into an embrace by a nearby relative. A few others at the house gather to offer their condolences. People all around walk pass them with refreshments and Erwin decides to take his leave. He makes his way to the driver's side of the car and looks up one last time at the home his wife spent her childhood in.

There he was, back to him, an unmoving figure gazing up at the house.

"Lieutenant."

He turns. The lieutenant was younger and shorter than he'd imagined. He had the most piercing eyes, the type of expression one would expect from someone who'd seen too many things.

"Keith asked me before his death to put you up with a place to stay. I'm his lawyer and son-in-law. My name is Erwin Smith."

The lieutenant looks at him for a long moment, deadpanned.

"Not interested."

Erwin steps closer, voice lowering. "I'm afraid you don't have much of a choice in the matter. I received a phone call from Hange yesterday."

His face darkens considerably.

"Here is my address and card. Call me whenever you're ready, lieutenant."

"It's Levi."

"Levi." Erwin watches as his gray eyes scan his address and business card. "I'm sorry for your loss. Keith was a good man."

Levi grimaces slightly. "Right." 

He looks at Erwin one last time before turning and walking into the house.

 

Erwin's phone rings the next day. It's the security downstairs.

"Yes."

"I have a guest here to see you, sir. A Keith Shadis."

Erwin freezes for second at the name. Very clever.

"Thank you. Send him up."

Erwin reads the clock on the wall. Ten past nine. He glances down at Kit, looking up at him with a happy expression.

"Sit."

Kit sits obediently.

"Good. Stay there." He opens the door and leans against the frame, arms crossed.

Levi eventually appears and strides towards him. He's dressed down in black, cold eyes wandering the length of the hallway, scanning each exit, door number, and utility room. His hard gaze eventually settles on Erwin and he stops abruptly in front of him at a safe distance. The lieutenant looked exhausted and on edge. One of his hands held a dark duffel bag, the other his jacket.

He stands aside. "Good to see you've made it. Come in."

Levi doesn't reply. His gray eyes rapidly survey the layout of his foyer as he crouches to unlace his boots.

"Leave your things here for now. Let me get you acquainted."

He locks the door. Levi abandons the bag and silently follows him into the living room. 

The large German Shepard is sitting where he left him, ears perked forward.

"A police dog," Levi says distantly.

"Retired, yes. This is Kit."

Erwin had intended to tell him over the phone, but the lieutenant had never called. To his surprise, Levi stalks past him. He holds out an upturned hand for Kit to bury his nose in before cautiously rubbing behind his ears. Kit's tail immediately runs the length of the hardwood floor.

Erwin's lips twist. Good to know the lieutenant didn't have narcotics on him.

"He belongs to my coworker, Mike. His wife is pregnant so I'm helping ease the burden at home." He walks behind the large island into the open kitchen. "Do you want something to drink?" 

The refrigerator was mostly empty save for beer. He had been working a case late last night. He definitely was ill-prepared.

"I'm fine."

Levi reaches behind him and pulls out a firearm, still holstered. He places it a little loudly on the white countertop.

"Is this a problem?" he asks darkly.

Erwin uncaps a bottle for Levi regardless and puts it down next to the gun. 

"No. I own one as well."

Levi's eyes bore into him as Erwin uncaps one for himself.

"What kind of estate attorney are you? People fucking shoot you on the job?" he asks mockingly.

Erwin smiles wryly, amused. "I'm a prosecutor. I'm helping with the Shadis estate as a favor to my brother-in-law."

Levi narrows his eyes and drops into the stool opposite him. He wipes the mouth of the bottle on his shirt before taking a swig. Kit stays close to him, watching his every move. Erwin notices how Levi's face changes a bit when he looks at the dog. He's glad Mike had entrusted him to the task a few weeks ago. It otherwise eased an already uncomfortable situation.

"Where's your wife?" Levi questions, clearly uninterested. He smooths Kit's head.

Erwin doesn't answer, keeping his face neutral. Levi looks up at him after a moment with piercing eyes.

"She died several years ago."

Levi's expression doesn't change.

"I see."

Erwin takes another swig and sets the beer down, schooling his body language carefully.

"Let me show you where you'll be staying."

Levi doesn't say anything as he shows him the spare bedroom and its adjoined bathroom. 

"My office is here and I stay there at the end of the hall. I work late most nights so use anything you'd like freely. The building sends a housekeeper every few days. Use the safe in the closet."

Erwin hands him the swipe card for the building, his spare key, and the numbers to his cell and home line. 

"Thanks," he grunts shortly. 

"You're welcome to settle in. I have a case I need to work on so I'll be in the office. Let me know if you need anything."

Levi nods. He gathers his belongings and disappears into the bedroom.

 

It's close to midnight when Erwin emerges from the office. Levi's door is firmly shut. He pours a few centimeters of whiskey into a glass in the kitchen and takes a sip, letting the burn course through his insides. The sound of the street below filters into the living room and he looks up.

The balcony door was slightly ajar. 

Levi sits on the wall with one leg up, staring down at the city. Erwin takes in his graceful figure against the glow of the lights below. He couldn't help but think there was something very sad and beautiful about him.

Kit lays at his feet and perks up when Erwin joins them. Levi doesn't move as he leans forward on the wall. They stay in comfortable silence, the cold numbing his skin.

"Lieutenant, I filed for an internal investigation of Keith's death a few days ago."

"I'm aware. Hange has me on the case."

"Good. Then you'll understand I'll eventually have to ask you for a deposition."

"That's fine."

Erwin pauses. The lieutenant was more subdued than before. He changes subjects.

"I don't have many visitors, but here's the short list of it." He hands him a paper. "I'll tell anyone who asks that you're a business associate of my brother-in-law's. He works for the central government. No one will question you, as he can't legally discuss his work."

Levi's eyes scan the names and faces, memorizing their ages, occupations, and relation to him. He hands it back to Erwin.

"Got it."

"I leave every morning around seven. When I return depends on the day. I hope you can get some rest tonight." Erwin nods at him and moves to turn. 

"Sorry about your wife." He stops in place as Levi meets his gaze evenly. "The old man never mentioned it."

"Don't be," Erwin says quietly, after a moment. He opens the balcony door. "Good night."

 

 

"I have the general idea. No specifics." 

Erwin stands outside his office building and leans against the railing. He pins his cell phone between his ear and shoulder briefly to put on leather gloves.

"You're intuition's good as always, Erwin," Hange replies.

He'd worked with Hange for many years as a criminal prosecutor, enough to consider her a close colleague of sorts. Her position was unique to the force. She was head of the internal affairs unit, coined the Rat Squad, charged with investigating police misconduct. 

"We believe a mole targeted and killed two undercover officers in the field. Levi was pulled before they could discover him. I'm positive now Shadis was being tracked at the precinct and they may have discovered that he was their police contact. I was charged with supportive assistance from my end but never saw them, never knew their names, and wasn't privy to their assignments. We're now working to determine if Shadis's death during the drug sting was police or gang related."

"I want the names of everyone in the precinct and the teams Shadis used during the sting."

"That'll be a lot of people. You have a moment after work? Stop by. Levi's here."

"Is he." Erwin had been wondering about the lieutenant's whereabouts since this morning.

"He's doing desk jobs for me for now. The others only know he was transferred from a different prefecture far up north. I move many people around on a regular basis, so it shouldn't be a cause for suspicion."

"Has anyone approached him?"

Hange laughs a little. "Around here, staying far away from me and anyone I reassign is the best way to keep your job. They'll think I'm investigating him so no one will ask questions."

"Good. I'll continue to cover things on my end."

"We should keep in contact regularly, since you're housing one of ours. It'll be a few weeks before we reestablish his identity and bank accounts. He's undergoing a period of psychological evaluation in the meantime."

"I see. Anything I should be made aware of?"

Erwin hears Hange pause, understanding his meaning. "He's... The lieutenant's depressed. I hope you can overlook his abrasive nature, my understanding is that he wasn't always like this."

"I understand. I'll see you in a few hours."

 

 

Erwin collects his keys after passing through the metal detectors. Hange's office was located on the second floor, in a glass enclosure overlooking the rest of the department. Most of the officers had left for the day. The night shift was coming in. He passes Levi sitting at a desk near the stairs, intently reading the documents in his hands.

"Lieutenant," he greets quietly as he climbs.

Levi looks up, surprise quickly replaced by a neutral expression as he nods.

Hange shakes his hand when she sees him and immediately turns to pull up the profiles of every officer. Their names and pictures plaster all three monitors on her screen.

"The trail's run a bit cold. I think they're going to lie low for now. The highest-ranking officer in the division dying is enough to rouse questions."

She has names outlined in red to show those involved in the sting. 

"This includes operation and remote support teams."

Erwin hovers behind her to study each one. He points to three officers.

"I want you to look into these individuals."

Hange gives him a strange look. "Can I ask why?"

"Just a feeling."

"All right." They exchange a few files of the information Erwin had requested, and he signs a confidentiality agreement.

"Call Levi's extension in a few minutes. Tell him I'll wait for him outside."

Hange smiles at him. "See you, Erwin. We'll talk soon."

 

"Have you eaten?" Erwin asks when Levi walks out of the precinct, adjusting his collar to the cold.

"No."

"Join me then. I meant to pick up a few groceries today, but didn't get around to it. I'll be freed up a little more tomorrow."

"It's fine. Just give me a list of what you want done. I don't intend to freeload."

Erwin smiles a bit. "I didn't think you were."

Levi silently follows Erwin into a casual noodle shop at the street corner. He sits moodily into a seat as the owner stops Erwin in the aisle to chat with him. Eventually, new customers divert the woman's attention back to the entrance.

"Erwin."

He turns at the familiar voice. "Marie."

She kisses both his cheeks in greeting, telling her coworkers to go ahead. They eye Erwin with interest.

"We can't thank you enough you for everything you've done, Nile especially. He isn't taking things well as you can expect."

Erwin frowns. "I'll call him later."

"He's working late tonight. First day back. Tomorrow will be better."

He nods. She looks down.

"I haven't had a chance to really comprehend what's happened. We saw his dad too before he left for work. Had a normal dinner and everything.

Out of the corner of his eye, Erwin notices how Levi remains very still in his chair. Marie hadn't know about him staying in the Shadis household. Erwin was suddenly glad the owner had kept him standing.

"Give it time. How are you holding up with the pregnancy?" he asks, distracting her.

Her face brightens a bit. "Fine. Hungry all the time and gaining weight," she laughs.

Marie knocks her fist lightly against his side.

"I don't understand how you can be this in shape with all the alcohol and shit you put in your body."

"Genetics."

"What an ass."

Marie sometimes flirted with him like this, though never in front of Nile. They'd been friends for a long time.

"You seeing anyone?" she asks casually. "My friends keep asking about you. Want me to set you up with one of them?"

He gives her a pointed look. "Marie."

"I know, I know. You're just such a good catch. I worry about you sometimes, you know."

She pats his cheek lightly before retrieving her purse from the table.

"Will you be okay walking home alone?" he asks.

She rolls her eyes. "I'm pregnant, not crippled. I'll see you later. Call Nile tomorrow, okay?" 

"All right."

Erwin waits until it's clear she's left before taking a seat, settling heavily into the chair.

"Sorry," he tells Levi, "This is the first time I've seen her here." 

The other man doesn't reply, keeping his eyes downcast. They eat in silence for most of the evening.

Levi removes his cell phone from his pocket and thumbs to a screen. He puts it on the table and slides it upside down towards Erwin.

"My number."

Erwin takes out his own and copies it into his contacts. He dials the number briefly and disconnects when Levi's phone vibrates.

"Thank you."

"It's easier in the future if I leave the situation so you don't have to explain," he says, referring to Marie.

Erwin nods and looks around at the cafeteria-style eatery. "It isn't unusual to sit at this shop with strangers, but yes, I agree."

He watches Levi drink his tea with his back against the wall, sitting sideways in the chair to face the exit. The lieutenant was always on high alert, as if ready to run or fight at any second. Erwin is struck with a tinge of pity as he considers how Levi couldn't live his life normally, with leisure or freedom of choice, as he did. It had probably been this way for years. Had Keith not pulled him out, Levi would probably not be sitting here with him. Worse yet, if his father-in-law had been killed before the extraction, he would've left Levi permanently trapped, most likely to die.

Not a single person anywhere would've known that he'd been a police officer. There would be no acknowledgement of his hardship or sacrifice, no mourners saluting him at a funeral, not even a gravestone.

"It must be lonely."

Levi looks up at him, stare removed of its usual coldness. It was at that moment Erwin wanted to give Levi an ordinary life. He wanted Levi to stop running and be still with him.

"You get used to it," he says emotionlessly, taking another sip.

The feeling doesn't leave him as he walks alone back to the apartment. Levi stays several meters behind him this time instead of next to him for his own safety.


	2. Chapter 2

Erwin stares at the boiling water as he prepares dinner, leaning back on the counter. He can't remember the last time he properly used this kitchen. 

"Hey," Levi calls, snapping him out of his thoughts.

"Yes."

"I'm throwing this away." He takes one of Erwin's half empty beers out of the fridge and pours it down the sink. It had gone flat.

"Thanks."

Erwin drains the noodles and mixes it back with the Napa cabbage and sauce. Kit sits next to him, watching with curious interest. 

"You're laughing at me, huh?" Erwin murmurs, smoothing his head.

They sit in relative silence. Watching Levi eat, Erwin suddenly finds it strange that he'd been living alone all these years. Save for the occasional visitor, not seeing or conversing with anyone for weeks on end had been normal for him.

Levi washes the dishes as Erwin retrieves some files from his bag and organizes them on the kitchen island. Levi's eyes follow him as he makes coffee, but doesn't say anything as he turns off the water. 

"Would you like a cup?"

"No."

Erwin takes out a mug. Blowing on the surface, he drinks it black and turns around.

"Who are you on?" Levi asks, looking at the names and pictures.

"Officer Darlett. I'm starting with the individuals closest to Keith."

Levi nods, thumbing through his profile. Erwin knew he had to take Levi's deposition, but part of him hesitated, kept putting it off. Levi knew it too. Between taking on this case personally and his own work, he was starting to burn the midnight fuel.

"I'll be in the office."

"Yeah."

Erwin gives him a small smile before bidding him good night.

It's around two-thirty in the morning when he pads his way back to his room. Exhausted, he takes off his shirt and changes into gray sweatpants before collapsing face down on the bed.

When he wakes, the sun is up and a firm hand is on his shoulder. Levi stands over him, holding out his cell phone.

"Get up. Your coworker's been fucking calling since six this morning."

Erwin takes the phone and props himself on an elbow, now alert. Levi stands back away from him, cool, calculating eyes looking over his room. It's the first time he's been inside.

"Erwin, they've filed an injunction. You better get down here," Mike says urgently.

He reaches for his watch on the nightstand. Six-twenty.

"Call a paralegal to get started. I'll be there soon."

Erwin sits up to rest his arms on his knees, running a hand through his bed-tousled hair. He tosses the phone onto the sheets between to his legs.

"Thanks."

His clothes from last night were half folded on the other side of the bed. Levi's stoic expression doesn't change, cold gaze wandering briefly over his naked torso to the long scars on his upper right arm.

"I was in an automobile accident many years ago," he offers in explanation.

Levi adverts his eyes and walks away.

"Get cleaned up. You look like shit."

Erwin's lips twist as he heads for the shower.

Levi is staring out the windows from the kitchen stool in silence, back to him, when he's ready to leave. A few pieces of toast were packed in foil for him.

"Thank you," Erwin says, refiling items into his bag.

Levi turns his head slightly but doesn't reply. Erwin knows he should hurry but stops his movements to study him. Something was off.

Leaving his things, he moves to stand in front of the lieutenant.

"Levi."

He stares up at him. "What?"

Erwin looks him over. "What's on your mind?"

He can see Levi shift back slightly at the question, unused to his proximity.

"Nothing's on my mind. Don't you fucking have somewhere to be?"

"It can wait."

His eyebrows furrow, hard expression guarding the confusion in his eyes. His voice drops, becoming dangerously low. "What do you want from me?" 

It was a loaded question. 

"What do I want from you?" Erwin repeats, quietly, almost to himself.

They stare at one another. His cell rings again and he exhales, stepping back a bit. Levi visibly relaxes. 

"I have to go. I'll see you tonight."

Erwin gathers his things and leaves without looking back.

 

He returns later than expected that night. Levi's door is shut and he's left the apartment by the time Erwin wakes Saturday morning. 

Sitting on Levi's stool facing the window with coffee in his lap, Erwin replays the way the lieutenant had looked at him that previous morning. What did he want from him?

Mike calls. He's stopping to check in on the dog before they head back to the office for a few hours. Erwin closes the door to the second bedroom and moves Levi's shoes with his foot into the coat closet.

"It smells different in here. You having guests over or something?" Mike asks, scratching behind Kit's ears.

"It's been busy since Keith's passing," he answers neutrally. It was the truth.

It's late afternoon when he finally leaves. Erwin stands on the platform and looks up as an inbound light-rail approaches from the opposite side. It slows to a stop and he observes with absent interest as people move on and off.

One of them is Levi.

Hange calls that exact moment. 

"Yes," he answers shortly, eyes reading the signs above the platform. It was headed north.

"Erwin, the psychologist called. Levi never showed up to his appointment this morning."

"I'll get him. Let me call you back." 

He steps onto the rail and walks straight to the map, eyeing each stop. It was a direct route out of the city. Just how far did Levi intend to go?

He turns as they start to move. The lieutenant was alone one car down, elbows resting over his legs. Erwin is reminded of the way he sat bent over during Keith's funeral. 

There was something about Levi that Erwin couldn't seem to leave alone.

He makes his way over the junction and the lieutenant looks up, knife already hidden against his thigh. Erwin drops down next to him. Levi studies him with a mixture of surprise and uncertainty.

"About before, you don't need to tell me anything you don't want to."

Levi calms. He leans back and stares straight ahead. "That shitty four eyes put you up to this?"

"No. I'm here by coincidence."

Levi doesn't say anything.

"I don't plan to go back on my word to Keith, so just do as you please."

Levi accepts his answer, choosing to remain silent, and continues staring out into the distance. Erwin sits back and watches the buildings move by.

"How many minutes?"

"... Eighty."

"I see."

Erwin takes out his work and continues where he'd left off, now more at ease than he'd been all day. Levi watches him from the corner of his eye before looking away.

 

Erwin sees the ocean about seventy minutes in and stands. He moves to the opposite side of the car and leans on the railing, watching the color of the sky reflect off its surface.

"It's easier if I tell you," Levi says beside him all of a sudden, face impassive. He holds onto the railing above, cold eyes gazing out. Erwin knew the decision had been weighing on him the entire ride.

"Off the record or on?"

"Off. My statement will be removed of names. You might as well know now."

Erwin briefly glances behind the lieutenant. There was no one left on the car. 

"Okay. Let's start with where we're going."

Levi pauses. "I don't know, since there are no graves."

Erwin uncrosses his arms. "The two other informants. They were friends of yours?"

"Their real names were Isabel Magnolia and Farlan Church."

Erwin stiffens slightly, but keeps his outward appearance calm.

"They entered the police academy with me." 

"I'm sorry," he replies quietly. "When was the last time you saw them?"

"Six years ago." Levi's gray eyes stare distantly as slum-like houses start obscuring the ocean view.

Erwin understood now. He was visiting the hometown of his comrades. 

They stop on a street one block up from the water. It was a run-down fishing village. Keith must have factored in the obscurity of this place when he planted both officers. Isabel and Farlan may have even initially joined the police force to get out of these circumstances. 

He didn't know where Levi was from or if his intentions had been similar. He could have very well shared their gruesome fate. Of what Erwin could imagine, they were most likely tortured, bodies dumped somewhere in an unmarked grave. Would anyone have laid flowers for Levi? Where would they go?

The lieutenant slows as Erwin stops at a makeshift flower stand. He takes two bouquets out of the water. The man smiles warmly when he tells him to keep the rest of the money.

Erwin holds them out to Levi. "Take whatever time you need."

The lieutenant stares at the flowers for a long time before finally accepting them. Erwin stays behind. He watches as Levi turns away to climb the pier, a lonely figure in the cold wind. It was a long walk to the end. 

In the far distance, sometime later, Erwin thinks he can also make out orange and yellow petals being swept away into the ocean.

 

"Shadis hand picked all three of them. They had no families, no past, as far as I know."

"I want the names of everyone who's entered your station in the last six years. I can prioritize the statements I record."

"All right."

"Those individuals I pointed out. What year were they assigned to your location?"

Erwin hears her typing over the phone. "Two came in five years ago. The other eight. I'll send you everything."

"Thank you."

"What makes you so certain? I haven't been able to find anything out of the ordinary, their records are spotless."

"I'm not. Keep this between us for now."

"I will." He hears Hange pause. "Erwin, be honest with me, is this too much for you?"

"No."

"I meant Levi."

"I know that."

Hange is silent again on the line. "He's come to resent me over the years so he resists my help, but I'm equipped to handle these kinds of matters in the force. Let me know if you need me to step in."

"I'm fine, Hange."

"I'm glad Keith had someone like you he could trust, Erwin."

Erwin wanted to tell her it was because of his daughter.

Because his wife had once lived, he met Levi.

It's pitch black on the ride back to the city. Neither of them say a word, choosing to let the heavy silence linger instead.

Levi eventually folds his arms and rests his eyes, at ease that the rail was all but empty this hour. Erwin knew he had trouble sleeping, had once spotted the medication he was using. It was likely the lieutenant had been conditioned to conduct gang activities at night. Drug shipments were usually received during the early morning hours. There were probably other reasons for his insomnia that the psychologist was helping him through.

He watches their reflection against the glass before looking down at the line on his ring finger. Even now, after all these years, it still felt strange without the weight of the wedding band. Erwin turns his hand over and closes it into a fist.

His wife had died around the same time Levi left everything to go deep undercover. Erwin wonders how their lives had compared back then. What had Levi been doing when he buried his wife, was being consoled by strangers and acquaintances? At a time he'd felt the most alone in his life, Levi was probably experiencing the same thing.

He feels a warmness on his shoulder. Looking down, Erwin feels a twist in his heart, one that he hadn't felt in a long time.

Levi had fallen asleep against him. Despite the deep lines underneath his eyes, the lieutenant looked younger and at peace.

 

 

"Please state and spell your name for the record."

Sergeant Nanaba glances down at the recording device on the table. She sits up straight and follows his directive, slowly dictating her name.

"How many years have you been assigned to this station, sergeant?"

"Twelve years, sir."

This was the first member of the ground team he was interviewing, those that'd directly been with Shadis the night of his death.

Erwin had finished the upper circle of Keith's closest associates. Administratively speaking, they had the easiest access to information of his whereabouts. He had thought at first there was perhaps more than one mole, an informant at the top and one to execute on the ground, but this person looked to be working alone. There was nothing unusual yet.

Hange sits alone behind the double-sided glass as he asks his questions. 

"Did you see his body?"

"No, sir. I was radioed that he had fallen."

"Who radioed you?"

"One of my subordinates on the ground, I can't recall who."

"How many stories did the commissioner fall from the tower, sergeant?"

She pauses. "Twenty three," she whispers.

"Did you see what caused him to fall?"

"No, sir."

The sergeant was clearly becoming distressed, face contorting at the recollection.

"Thank you. Let's stop here for today. We will reconvene at a later time."

Nanaba looks as if she wants to say something to him, but hesitates. Erwin stops the recording and stands to gather his files. He mentally compartmentalizes his emotions of Keith's passing as he leaves the the room.

Levi is waiting outside for him when he finishes convening with Hange, eyes sharply watching every person walking on the street.

"I drove today," he says, gesturing to the direction of the parking lot. "The dark blue car."

He walks to the driver's side of the BMW M5 and starts the engine.

"It's late, I hope you don't mind if we pick up something."

"Yeah."

The car picks up his cell phone as he's driving. It was his brother-in-law. He can feel Levi's piercing stare on him.

"He's been calling about the investigation."

"Answer it," Levi finally says.

Erwin nods.

"Yes."

"Erwin. Do you have a moment? I know it's dinner time."

"Go ahead."

"I didn't want to have to ask you this over the phone, but I want to give you a chance to think it through before you answer."

Erwin glances at the screen monitoring the call. "About the case? What is it?"

"No, it's not about that... for once. It's been weighing on me since my dad's passing. Don't feel obligated to say yes, I'll understand if you decline."

Erwin saw it coming then. "It's about your son."

"Yeah. I wanted to ask you to be the God-Father to my boy. Marie and I would."

Erwin pauses.

Nile sighs a bit. "I'm going to hang up now before you give me one of your bullshit lawyer answers. Be honest with me this time. I know things... haven't exactly been easy for you. Talk to you soon."

He hangs up. There's silence in the car. 

"Sorry, you didn't need to hear that."

Levi stares straight ahead and doesn't reply.

When they return to the apartment, Erwin kneels down to greet the dog. He really did feel badly about leaving him alone most of the time. It was ironic that he'd been asked to care for Kit, but in turn mostly ended up asking his housekeeper for assistance.

"Did you sleep all day again?" he murmurs.

Kit produces a dog-like smile, tongue out and tail bobbing. Erwin makes a mental note to take him out somewhere soon.

They eat together in silence. He rereads Nanaba's file as Levi cleans up, crosschecking her testimony with Keith's autopsy reports.

"Erwin."

He looks up, registering that Levi didn't usually call him by name. The lieutenant's eyes were fixated on him.

"Yes."

"About yesterday."

"I won't be repeating any information you shared with me." He leaves out his conversation with Hange, despite the fact he hadn't shared their names with her.

"I know."

When Levi doesn't continue, he closes the file and asks gently, "Something else on your mind? I won't be intruding again if you don't want me to."

He hadn't meant to see Levi grieve.

"I don't understand why you give a damn. What exactly did the old man say to you?"

Erwin keeps his face neutral, meeting his gaze evenly. "He didn't say anything Hange wouldn't eventually tell me later."

"So you just fucking help every person around you is what you're saying."

"You mean about Nile."

"I mean about everything. People you're not related to, coworkers, strangers. What are you trying to do?"

Erwin knows he's getting close, can see Levi realizing he's led himself to the answer.

"What exactly happened to your wife?"


	3. Chapter 3

Low rumbles of thunder sound in the distance and eventually give way to rain. It patters a staccato rhythm against the windows, breaking the silence. Erwin knows why Levi's deep stare bothers him. His wife used to look at him the same way. 

"It's a conversation for another time." 

He gets up.

"Those scars on your body. It was supposed to be you."

Erwin freezes. 

"Yes." He can feel his ears ringing from the sounds of that day. "It was supposed to be me."

He remembers how his wife had reached out and turned the steering wheel at the last second, shielding him from impact. Glass and twisted metal everywhere, her blood covering everything.

"So yes, you could say I'm living on borrowed time. What anyone asks from me, takes from me, none of it matters anymore."

"That's bullshit."

He's stepping closer to Levi before he can stop himself.

"Why is it bullshit? Would you like me to be selfish?" he inquires calmly.

Levi involuntarily backs into the counter away from him, eyes alive with anger and something akin to fear.

"Is that what you want from me?" Erwin repeats back to him.

"Stop being a goddamned martyr. You don't even realize the person that needs help is you."

Erwin looks at Levi for a long time, lets the ache in his heart take the forefront of his decisions.

"I'm going to touch you."

Levi remains frozen in place as Erwin slowly reaches out and gently grasps the side of his face. His skin was so soft. Levi's breathing hitches, but he doesn't move, holding his ground. 

"Thank you," he murmurs, "for caring about me."

Levi returns in response, "Who the fuck said I cared about you?"

"I would give it all to you and you alone if you'd allow me."

Levi doesn't answer, eyes remaining downcast. Erwin steps away, smiling softly at him. Levi's body relaxes as he meets his eyes again.

"Good night, Levi," he says, before walking away.

 

 

The streets dry overnight. Erwin goes running with Kit early the next morning, letting the cold air numb his thoughts. They return to the building just as the sun is starting to come up. The receptionist hands him a package and his dry cleaning before he takes the elevator.

Levi is on the sofa, disassembled parts of his firearm on the coffee table, cleaning each piece. Erwin feels his chest twist slightly as Levi meets his gaze and holds it.

Kit jumps onto Levi in greeting. The lieutenant grimaces and guides the dog to sit next to him instead of on him. Erwin smiles and wordlessly hands him a lint roller, having long picked up on his aversion to dirt. Though he looks down disdainfully at the dog hair covering him, Erwin never once saw him resist Kit's affections.

He uses the letter opener to read his mail and starts making coffee, putting out tea for Levi.

"I'll be in the courtroom starting today. I requested some time off from work after the trial to focus on the Shadis investigation."

Levi nods.

Though both of them were carrying on as they normally did this morning, Erwin could still feel the underlying tension between them. He didn't need an answer from Levi, all he needed was to be with him. He couldn't remember when he'd last felt this way.

He showers, changes into a suit, and calls Nile afterwards in his office.

"I understand her sister and husband already have children of their own, but your son deserves to have a family to come home to should anything happen. I'll still be his uncle, I'm not going anywhere."

"No, I appreciate your honesty." Nile's voice was resigned, but earnest. "Marie wants to talk to you."

He hands the phone to her. "Erwin, we just want you to be happy. It worries me that you don't seem to want to remarry."

"I married young. Once is enough, that life is behind me now."

He hears her sigh and assures, "Don't worry, things aren't so bad right now."

"Nile will be going to the family home this weekend to clear out some personal items. We decided to put it up for sale. It was a hard decision, but I think it's for the best." She pauses. "Let us know if you need anything."

"I will. I have a broker I can recommend if you'd like." 

Keith had kept most of the photos of his wife still at the house. He preferred if Nile took them.

When he returns to the living room, Levi is watching the televised accounts of the new commissioner's public induction. He sits on the armrest beside him and takes a sip of coffee.

"What do you think about him?"

Levi clips the gun back into place. 

"Old ass shrewd."

When he leans back, his arm brushes against Erwin's thigh. Neither of them break the contact.

"Come with me this weekend. There's a place outside of the city I'd like to go."

"Like my circumstances give me much choice," he replies tersely, but doesn't decline. 

Erwin smiles. "I'll see you tonight."

Most of his first day is spent on jury selection and he makes his opening statement by mid-afternoon. 

 

 

"He talks about you sometimes," Hange says over the phone.

"I can't imagine that there's much to say. I believe the dog holds more interest than me." Erwin looks up at them.

"Well, he does."

Levi throws a stray branch as far as he can as Kit chases after it. Erwin doesn't answer her.

"I'll you see Monday, Erwin."

"Goodbye, Hange."

He stares down at the phone a bit before putting it away.

"What's with that look on your face?"

Levi is suddenly in front of him, lightly wrestling with Kit for the stick again.

"Nothing."

He narrows his eyes before letting his hand go. Kit lays down to gnaw on the branch. The snow had melted for the most part, but white still coated the entire surface of the water for as far as they could see. Erwin whistles for Kit to follow as they continue past the houses lining the lake, keeping his leash in hand halfway tucked out his jacket pocket.

They eventually reach a clearing in the trees and Levi slows to a stop to observe the sunset illuminating off the ice. Erwin just waits and watches him. He really was beautiful.

Kit pants happily in the backseat on the drive back. Levi looks out the window as they cross the bridge into the city and reaches a hand back to smooth Kit's jaw. Erwin smiles softly to himself. It wasn't often Levi let his guard down like this. He wanted to reach out and touch him again, but kept both hands firmly on the steering wheel.

The BMW picks up a call. It reads Keith Shadis. He meets Levi's eyes briefly before answering.

"Erwin, did you stop by here?" There's panic in Nile's voice. "There're papers and things everywhere."

"Hang up and call the police," he orders. "Leave right now."

"Yeah, I'll call you back."

Out of corner of his eye, Levi is sitting alert.

"I'll take you back first."

"I'm going with you."

"They may be looking for you, Levi. Did anyone know you were living at his house?"

"No."

"It would be better if you showed up with Hange's team under her direction. You're supposed to be confined to desk jobs."

Levi picks up his cell phone and dials for her.

 

 

There were boxes of papers and personal files strewn everywhere. The intruder had taken the home computer, but left every other electronic device untouched. The police were treating it as a robbery, but Erwin wasn't so sure it was as simple as it seemed.

Officers nearby were interviewing neighbors as bystanders stood outside of their houses to watch the activity.

"I want all surveillance video in this section of the district," Levi orders two officers outside of the house.

"Yes, sir." They leave.

Erwin walks a little ways out with Levi, talking quietly with him in the dark.

"What are your thoughts?"

"It was them. They could have been here as early as two days ago to as late as today."

"I'm assuming Keith had nothing here."

"They won't find anything in this place. Hange is keeping all of the old man's office files under lock and key at the precinct. They may try there next, but we've already gone through them."

"This may be a good opportunity to lure them out."

Levi looks up at him. "You mean plant false information."

He turns to study the police activity at the house. "Let me think about it more." 

Levi nods, cold eyes following each officer.

"They always come back to see for themselves. I've memorized every person present. Let me know if someone stands out to you," Erwin says.

"Yeah." After a pause, he comments, "You chose the wrong profession."

Erwin looks at him and smiles softly. "I've been told that."

Levi shoots him a wry, but pensive, look before walking away. 

He notices Marie's eyes on him as Nile is questioned by Hange and two other officers on the street.

"Erwin, what's your relationship with that man?" she asks, eyes focused on Levi. "He was there when I ran into you that other night at dinner."

"We're working together on the internal investigation."

Marie nods, but doesn't avert her stare. "Why didn't you introduce him then?"

Erwin weighs his options, noting how she doesn't comment on the robbery and investigation overlapping. "My apologies, I didn't deem it necessary at the time."

"You're hiding something."

"What do I have to hide, Marie?"

"The fact that you like him."

"Pardon?" Erwin keeps his face impassive, uncertain if he should be concerned or relieved at her admission.

"We've known one another for a long time, Erwin. Tell me, does he know?"

"Marie, these aren't the right circumstances." He gestures at the police cars all around. "We can pick this up another time."

She sighs and smiles tightly. Behind her, he can see Levi watching them intently.

 

 

It's ten-forty by the time Erwin returns to the apartment. Levi wasn't back yet. He had dropped Kit off with Mike earlier, being pressed for time to reach the crime scene. He shrugs out of his jacket, discards it over the arm of the sofa, and collapses onto the cushions in exhaustion.

"Erwin. Hey," Levi calls.

Erwin slowly wakes to Levi standing over him. The clock behind him read eleven-fifty. 

"Don't sleep here."

He silently sits up. Erwin reaches out and pulls Levi down by the arm. He stiffens immediately, but doesn't resist, letting Erwin lean his upper body against his back.

"What are you doing?" he asks quietly.

"Isn't it obvious?"

Erwin stares straight ahead as he feels the warmth of his back. He thinks about the first time he saw Levi, saw him standing in front of the Shadis household, back to him, gazing up. Part of him had known then that his life wouldn't be the same. Erwin no longer knew about his ability to keep Levi safe.

Levi doesn't say anything. Erwin can feel him looking down, still tense. 

"I don't get what you want from me."

"What I want," Erwin repeats, "is an ordinary life for you. I want you to stop running and live in the moment with me."

Levi meet his eyes then, the raw emotion behind his stare boring right through him. "Do I look like I'm running now?" he asks dangerously in a low voice.

"You and I both know you may no longer be safe here. The informant is actively searching for you. Marie also suspects your connection to me."

"I know."

"It was careless of me that day."

"It wasn't your doing. She noticed because she's in love with you."

Levi keeps his intense gaze directly on him, gray eyes watching his reaction carefully. Erwin keeps his face impassive. Part of him already knew a long time ago.

His cell phone rings on the table. Levi looks away to read it. Erwin knows it's Marie from the way his eyes darken.

"Leave it. I don't give a damn," Erwin says.

Levi leans forward to meet his lips then, resigned, angry. He pushes him back, hand on his collar. Erwin lets him, gently holding his face. 

The physical connection between them becomes urgent. Erwin grunts softly as Levi straddles him and starts unbuttoning his shirt. The ringing continues and he thinks distantly that they were doing this while Marie waited. 

"Do you have anything?" Levi asks breathily against his lips.

Erwin racks his brain. He lays his head back heavily, offering a small, apologetic smile. Levi sits back with an expression that's both deeply unamused and vaguely appeased. Erwin affectionately traces his hip bone as they calm down.

"Do you even know what to do?" Levi asks, deadpanned.

"It's not exactly the first time."

"Were you sober?"

"No."

"Well, you better remember this. Get in the shower." 

He pulls Erwin by the belt to follow as he moves off him. 

They stumble into the shower and Erwin runs a hand down his side as he peels off his clothes, admiring his body. He backs Levi into the water against the wall, tonguing him urgently. Levi moans as he fists them together, his voice echoing against the tiles.

"Shit... Erwin..."

Erwin really wishes he had condoms on hand. He doesn't let Levi move, pinning him to the wall. Levi's hands push at his abdomen, trembling in his hold. Erwin strokes them faster, capturing his mouth as he groans up into him. He couldn't get enough of the sounds Levi made, wanted to fuck him right there and then.

He presses a finger into Levi and he jolts, throwing his head back as he breaks contact with his lips. Erwin works his fingers and traps his body against him as he struggles. Levi's practically gasping into his shoulder, convulsing with pleasure.

"I want to be inside you like this," he whispers into his ear.

Levi pushes at him. "Fuck you," he breathes without any bite.

Erwin smiles and lets go, kissing him again, tenderly this time. Levi reaches out to stroke him, body still trembling as Erwin lathers them both, keeping their faces intimately close.

Eventually, the water rinses them clean and Levi is barely able to turn it off before Erwin backs them towards the bed. He pushes Levi onto the mattress and hovers over his naked figure as they kiss deeply. 

"Fuck, you're big." Levi runs his fingers over his length again and Erwin grunts softly, pinning his wrists beside him instead.

He grinds his hips lightly between his spread legs. Levi's breath hitches with each movement.

"Are you going to fuck me like this?" Levi rasps against his lips.

"Eventually, yes."

He rolls his hips slower, rocking Levi with him. "I'm going to make love to you until your body knows no one else."

Levi becomes quiet at that. Erwin lets his wrists go and holds him, burying his face into his neck. They just lie together, dripping wet, in silence. Levi encircles his shoulders slowly, fingers ghosting over his scars.

They spend the rest of the weekend in his bed having sex and sleeping. Levi was exhausted, years of fatigue now only being remedied as he lay face down next to Erwin, breathing slowly and evenly. Erwin watched over him protectively, knowing these moments of peace were few and far between for Levi. 

He eventually wakes again and turns his head to look at him. Erwin moves closer to gently meet his lips and Levi's eyes darken at his touch. Erwin didn't even know why he bothered putting on clothes anymore. He couldn't control himself. Levi willingly lays spent and passive underneath him as he trails his mouth over his damp hair and neck, the recipient to years of his pent up frustrations and yearnings. He rolls on another condom and takes him from behind. Levi moans into the sheets and holds onto his wrist.

It's nearly nine o'clock when Levi finally grumbles, "I'm starving."

"I'll make something."

"Are we actually going to eat this time or are you just going to pound my ass the entire night?"

Erwin twists his lips and turns towards him. Levi gets up before he can touch him.

"Put these on," he orders, tossing his pants at him.

They sit at the small late night cafe within the building. Levi groans shortly to no one in particular and puts his head down on his arm.

"Are you all right?" Erwin asks nonchalantly, twisting the long paper left over from his straw absently into a loop.

"You already know the answer to that, asshole."

Erwin half smiles in apology. Half of him wasn't.

When they come back to the apartment, Levi uses his shower. He stops by the office to listen to his voicemails and return a few e-mails. There were no new developments from the burglary as of yet. One of Hange's assistants was analyzing video footage from all major surrounding streets. Marie didn't call again.

Erwin brings a glass of water to the bedroom.

Levi's under the covers, drifting off on his side by the time Erwin's finished showering. One of the lamps was left on. He stops next to the nightstand to take a sip of the water. Levi's eyes slowly open at the sound of the ice and rapidly gain clarity. He rakes his gaze over Erwin's body in anticipation and lies on his back.

Erwin climbs onto the bed, feeling the mattress dip under his weight. He pulls the covers off Levi's naked figure and laps at his nipple. He nearly jumps at the coldness. Erwin moves to the other and Levi's hands are firmly grasping his shoulders. He trails down to his navel, worshipping every centimeter of his torso before settling between his legs, letting his cock slide in and out if his cold mouth. Levi's body contorts at the sensation and he emits the the most honest sounds.

He eventually fists his hair and pushes at him. "Erwin... fuck... stop..."

Levi's quivering underneath him and erratically breathing by the time he lets him go. Levi sits up and pushes him to lie on his back. 

"Fuck me already," he murmurs.

Erwin prepares him and Levi leans forward to bite his lip, rolling a condom onto him. Erwin inhales sharply at the deepness when he enters, grasping his hip. He lets Levi move slowly and steadily over him, reveling in the way it felt. He kisses him and rolls his hips up to meet his stride.

Levi nearly stops when he does, trembling over him. He continues to gently rock up into him and Levi groans. 

"Does that feel good?" he breathes. He holds Levi closer. Levi isn't able to answer him, eyes squeezed shut and moaning into his mouth as Erwin fists his cock until he comes on his stomach. He grunts at the tightness and follows shortly.

They have sex again in the morning before he goes to work. Erwin wins the trial by mid-afternoon.

"Congratulations." Mike shakes his hand. 

"You too," he returns as he continues to file his notes away.

"Want to grab a drink?"

"Sorry, I'll have to take a rain check."

Mike snorts. "Are you going to introduce me to this person you're rushing to see every night, or are we going to continue to pretend like they don't exist?"

Erwin carefully schools his body language, smiling tightly. "I see there's no hiding things from you, Mike."

Mike smiles easily and shrugs. "Kit kind of told me," he jokes. "Don't take this the wrong way, but it's about time you got some. I'm tired of watching women throw themselves at you. You look happy for once."

He claps his shoulder lightly and walks out of the courtroom. "You owe me a drink soon."

Erwin drives past the Shadis household as the afternoon sun starts to dip in the sky. He parks on the street and empties his bag of his files, putting in the equipment he brought along instead. After a moment, he decides to get his gun from the glove compartment and steps out of the car.


	4. Chapter 4

Erwin puts his gun in the shoulder holster underneath his suit. He closes the bag and walks towards the Shadis household.

"This is Erwin Smith, transfer me to Captain Ness," he orders, dialing the precinct.

"Captain, you're heading the investigation to the Shadis burglary. I'm going through the house as the owners' estates attorney to get some personal effects. It's taped off, but I'll be proceeding."

"Let me radio the officers in your area. It's better if you don't go in alone," the captain responds.

"There's no need." He hangs up and stares at the police tape lining the house.

For the informant to be this brazen, they must still think there are undercover officers in the field. Levi had been extracted so close to Shadis's death that one could even assume his activities had ceased because they severed his police contact. Ultimately, it was his father-in-law's passing that protected Levi. Erwin wondered vaguely if Keith had met the informant before his death, had said something to them to make them continue searching. Erwin couldn't take any chances.

He enters the house using his copy of the key and is immediately met with a family portrait on the mantle. Erwin tenderly thumbs the dust off his wife and Keith's faces before slowly turning the frame down. 

He walks upstairs past his wife's childhood room. It had long been refurbished into a guest room. Erwin wonders briefly if this was where Levi stayed. He makes his way to Keith's bedroom and suppresses his emotions at his father-in-law's belongings and personal documents strewn all over the floor. He starts setting up the equipment from the second story window, keeping everything discreetly hidden amongst the tangle of wires from the disconnected computer. When Erwin's finished, he moves back to the living room.

"Counselor."

Erwin looks up from the box on the floor. An officer was standing in the front doorway.

"I'm Officer Annie Leonhardt. I was radioed to accompany you inside."

"Good afternoon. My brother-in-law is selling this house soon." He gestures to the pictures piled in front of him. "I'm here to collect some personal items."

"I didn't know you were married to the commissioner's daughter, sir."

Erwin gives her a tight smile.

Annie enters, looking around the room. Her eyes settle on the media player and tapes on the shelves.

"Keith had always been a bit of an audio buff. He recorded his children's voices growing up, of them reading, singing, conversations, that sort of thing." Erwin walks over to the shelf. "Many people didn't know he preferred it over newer technologies."

Annie watches as he empties select tapes from the shelf into the box.

"You're here alone, counselor?"

"Yes. Tell me, officer, do you know why Keith died?"

She pauses. "I'm not sure I'm able to answer that question, sir."

"I ask because I've come to second guess if I knew Keith as well as I had thought."

He watches as Annie's face remains unchanged. "Everyone has secrets."

"Only the dangerous sort lead to death." He turns to give her a pointed look, studying her stoic expression before continuing. "Has Captain Ness made a statement as to why all the media was left untouched?"

"He thinks the intruder ran out of time."

"Do you mind if I play some of these, officer? They're unlabeled."

She backs onto the front step to give him space, turning her back to him. "Go ahead."

He puts one of the discs into the player. It was a recording between Keith and a younger Nile. Erwin takes it out, labels it with a marker, and puts it into the box. He switches to another blank. His wife this time. She must have just learned to speak. Erwin keeps him body language calm, repeating the action again. He eventually slides in the eighth recording.

"Who knows of your ties to the police?"

"No one."

"Are you a gang member?"

"If you think I'm going to-"

Erwin stops the player. Annie's piercing eyes are on him.

"Officer, are you going back to the station?" he asks slowly.

"Yes."

"I'm going to motion these be reviewed. Some seem to be related to Keith's work."

He takes a smaller, down-turned box off the floor and starts emptying the entire shelf. "Would you be able to give these to Lieutenant Zoe and notify the captain?"

"Yes."

Erwin dials for the precinct. "It's me." He crouches down to mark the side of the cardboard. "There's a box labeled P-5.4 coming down to you from the house, have your team look at it. Right. Okay." He hangs up and nods to Annie as she takes it from him. "Thank you, officer."

Erwin watches as she walks back to the patrol car before turning to leave.

 

 

The sky darkens and droplets of water freckle his windshield by the time he pulls into the building. Spring was coming. 

He enters the apartment and shrugs out of his coat, hanging it up. The air was cold and sounds of the cars below echoed the interior. Levi was standing on the balcony, watching the rain.

Erwin walks out under the overhang, standing a little ways back from him. 

"You're back early."

Levi's cool gaze turns to him. 

"I could say the same about you." 

Levi's eyes travel down to the front of his suit jacket and he steps forward towards him, pulling the gun out from underneath it. He stares down hard at the firearm.

"What the fuck were you doing there?"

Erwin takes his chin and kisses him. Levi doesn't respond, pulling away.

"Don't touch me."

Erwin presses forward, grip now tighter on his jaw, and meets his lips again, gentler this time. The gun slowly drops to Levi's side. 

"Fuck you," he breathes when Erwin lets go.

They don't make it to the bedroom. Levi shoves him into the sofa and pulls at his tie, sitting on him. Erwin just watches as he starts unbuttoning his shirt. He wanted to tell Levi everything, how he wanted to be with him, how painfully beautiful he was, how he couldn't imagine going back to living alone without him, but he doesn't.

"Run away with me."

Levi stops. The raw emotion in his eyes is quickly replaced by a cold expression.

"And go where?" he asks bitterly.

"Anywhere."

Erwin could tell from his tight expression that this was something Levi had once considered. He pulls him down and kisses him, sliding a hand up underneath his shirt. Levi tugs his own shirt loose from his waist. He can't stop trembling over him and Erwin isn't sure if it's from the cold or his touch.

"You're shaking," he whispers. 

"Keep me warm then, idiot."

Erwin smiles and walks them to the bedroom.

Levi grunts softly as he's set down on the mattress, legs to either side of Erwin's standing figure. His body continues to tremor as he's undressed. Erwin leans down to kiss him in reassurance. His skin burned under his touch. 

He doesn't get on the bed, hovering over Levi as he drives himself slowly and intimately into him. Levi half pushes him away, half pulls him closer the entire time, tortured by his pace. He lets out a strangled moan when he moves his hips closer off the edge of the bed.

"Fuck..."

Erwin cradles the back of his neck, bringing them centimeters apart. He meets his lips briefly, then watches every contortion of Levi's face as he continues. 

"Look at me."

Levi locks eyes with him but isn't able to hold it steadily. His irises were dark with desire and frustration.

"Fucking pervert... do it harder already," he breathes.

"Turn around," he orders, voice low.

Levi obeys. He fists the sheets and whines into them as he's slammed into. Erwin pushes his neck down and grips his hip, bringing him half standing off the bed. Levi whimpers under him as he quickens the pace until they both come. His body goes slack afterwards on the edge of the mattress, quivering.

"Shit..." he whispers.

Erwin pulls the covers tightly over him afterwards. He listens to the rain with him as his breathing slows.

"Are you warm?" He kisses his neck gently. Levi doesn't say anything, burying his face further into his shoulder. Erwin holds him, thinking with an aching heart how he didn't want this moment to end. 

Levi's asleep when he pads back to his office in just loose pants later. There's a message from Marie. He hesitates before listening to it.

"Erwin, I'm sorry if I crossed the line the other day. Clearly, I've struck a chord because I've never seen you wait this long to return a call. I'm here when you're ready to talk. ...Thank you for everything you've done, I know it's been difficult."

He deletes the message. Erwin didn't know if he'd ever be ready to talk. He was willing to do whatever it took to shield Levi. And what would he say to Marie? 

He moves to stand at the doorway of Levi's bedroom. The room looked barely lived in, as it did when he first arrived. He makes for the closet and starts emptying it methodically.

Hange calls when he starts making dinner.

"Hange."

"Erwin. I'm close to your building. Are you able to meet with me?"

Erwin keeps his voice calm and he immediately walks towards his bedroom, caution rising. "Is everything okay?"

"It'll be easier if I show you in person. I'm five minutes away."

"Okay."

He hangs up and gently threads a hand through Levi's hair to wake him.

"Hange's downstairs," he murmurs, leaning in.

Levi's immediately awake, eyes alert. Erwin resists the urge to kiss him and moves away to change his clothes.

Hange smiles tightly when she enters his apartment. She had used her badge to walk straight past security, dressed in civilian clothes. "Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt your evening."

"No, it's fine." He locks the door behind her.

"Are you all right?" Levi asks calmly from behind on the step to the foyer.

Erwin turns and stills. Levi had his gun pointed directly at her. It had also crossed his mind that she may be compromised.

"The king still sleeps," she replies.

Levi lowers the firearm. "What the fuck are you doing here?" He was dressed casually in jeans and a loose gray sweater. 

"Let's sit first if you don't mind." 

Erwin recalled her mentioning that their working relationship was at times hot and cold. He had never seen them interact directly. Erwin follows Hange into the living room. The lieutenant glares at him as he passes, eyes burning with questions. He had gone back to his room. 

"I made a point of asking around the precinct for a second audio player after your stint this afternoon. My team then went back to the Shadis household to empty it of all media." Hange pauses, taking out her laptop and placing it on the kitchen counter. "I saw this in the camera you set up when I got there."

Hange turns the screen towards them and plays the footage of Annie Leonhardt walking back into the house with the box Erwin gave her. Erwin’s blood runs cold. Levi immediately stiffens next to him. 

Hange looks gravely at him, eyes serious. "I'm going to ask you very carefully, Erwin. What reason did Officer Leonhardt have to return inside?"

"She's dead," Levi whispers, knuckles white around the gun in his hand. 

Hange takes a step back to face him. "Levi," she cautions, "her actions are condemning, yes, but this video's not enough evidence to present a case. She’s an officer entering an already burglarized house. Judge Zackly will never go for this." 

"Not before I kill her."

"We don't know if there are others like her still out there or what she knows. We need her for questioning,” Erwin interjects calmly. 

Levi’s cold eyes were ladened with hatred, body visibly shaking in rage.

"I understand," Erwin says, quieter," I was prepared to kill her today if it became necessary."

Hange looks as if she’s about to say something, but stops. 

"You knew,” Levi spits accusingly.

“Yes."

“How?”

"Aside from myself, she was the only one who noticed you were an officer at the funeral. She was then the first to respond to the call that I was at the house."

"Erwin wasn't able to see her face at the funeral, so he asked me to closely monitor all blonde females in the precinct. I made sure to circulate that you were on suspended assignment in case they decided to look closer into the timing of your arrival." Hange explains, turning back to the video. 

Levi stares at them, jaw tight.

"She entered through the back of the house where the lock was first broken. Then exits about eighteen minutes later here." She fasts forwards to her leaving. "What I don't understand is why she didn't play the discs in the patrol car. There wasn't much left from what Erwin brought."

"It was a copy of a deposition I worked on with Mike that set her off. I used one of his voice and planted it long before she arrived." Erwin recalls Annie's detached, calculating stare, of how close he had been in the room to a cold-blooded murderer. "She must have thought there was more. I put in fifty-four."

"Yes, I counted fifty-four. She must know it's a dead end then." 

Hange's eyes travel up to Erwin, then Levi, face draining of color. "You shouldn't stay here anymore. She may start following you."

"I have a second location prepared." Hange and Levi both watch as he takes out a set of keys from a drawer. "Did you drive, Hange?"

"Yes," she replies. "I'm going back to the precinct to pull all her information. Give me a call as soon as you can." She packs her laptop and makes for the door immediately. 

"I can’t stop you from leaving," he implores Levi, sensing his inner conflict, “but you forget I share the same hatred.” Cold eyes turn to him. “I need you to trust me."

Levi looks at him long and hard before turning to comb the apartment one last time. Erwin takes his silence as agreement and gathers some last minute items and makes two phone calls as they leave. The elevator slowly descends to the parking deck.

"My other car, here." Erwin gestures to the white Lexus. "Your things are in the back."

"When the fuck were you planning on telling me all this?" he asks, now calmer, as he gets into the passenger's side.

"Now, I suppose." Erwin starts the engine. "I decided on a contingency plan the day you entered my apartment."

"I guess I know why they have names for you down at the precinct," he mutters grimly.

Erwin keeps his face impassive. He knew his track record showed he killed more criminals through death sentencing than actual police officers. It was common knowledge that he treated people like chess pieces on the job. It wasn't necessarily a far stretch from the truth.

"And do you agree with them?" he asks Levi in a low voice.

The lieutenant stares vacantly at the rain pummeling the windshield. "I don't give a shit."

Erwin's lips twist a bit. The lieutenant's piercing eyes study his profile before looking away. Erwin could feel the wrath in Levi's heart. He was thinking hard about Annie. They ascend the highway.

"Where are we going?"

"My family co-owns a temple on the outskirts of the city. It remains mostly empty now. It's managed by a caretaker a few times a week and houses visiting monks as they pass through the country. There's no one there at the moment."

"And your family?"

"My father passed away when I was young. My mother remarried and lives overseas."

Levi nods. 

It's silent in the car after that. They were intimately involved, but Erwin knew just as little of Levi’s past as Levi did of his. They were apparent magnets for death.

“Sorry,” Levi mutters. “Of his passing, I mean."

Erwin reaches out and gently brings Levi's closed fingers to his lips. His hand was warm. He slowly presses a kiss into it. Erwin couldn’t explain why he connected with Levi like this. It consumed him, this emotion he felt every time they were together, like he had been waiting for him. Years of logical, perfectly sharpened intellect hadn’t provided him an answer. In the context of where they were going and what he had studied growing up, they must have been very close in his last life. 

"What are you doing?" Levi asks quietly, but doesn't pull his hand away. Erwin smiles and lets him go. 

They eventually arrive at the shrine. It’s shrouded in fog on the side of a small mountain, obscured by trees and surrounding houses. Levi disappears a bit to circle the perimeter. The living quarters were in the back, while the front was open to visitors. Erwin walks inside, memories of his childhood flooding back at the familiar hallways. He visits his father's altar in a private room and lights the incense. Kneeling, he silently tells him he’s brought Levi here, that had he been alive, he would have wanted him to meet him. 

Levi is on the phone with Hange when he returns to the open courtyard. He's sitting bent over on the front steps, staring moodily at the clouded city below in the distance. Levi stands and wordlessly hands him the cell, walking back towards the car. 

"Hange. It's me."

"Erwin."

"I’m taking Officer Leonhardt's deposition tomorrow. Where is she now?"

“She’s left for the day, I’m having her tracked.”

“Don’t let your man get too close. It’s important she arrives at the station unsuspecting. You should watch your back too in the meantime."

"I will." He hears her pause. “How are things with Levi?"

Erwin looks up as the lieutenant shuts the car door and stalks inside.

"I'll go over the plan with him."

"That doesn't answer my question."

Erwin turns to stare out at the city. "Please clarify then."

"What did you say to get him to go with you?"

"I asked him to trust me."

Hange's silent on the phone. "You've always had a strong will over others, Erwin, but this is rather uncharacteristic of him."

"I sense that."

"Thank you. I'm glad he has someone he can rely on. I'll be in touch."

 

 

Erwin hangs up and silently hands the cell back to Levi when he gets inside. The lieutenant was standing in the middle of the common area, eyes wandering distantly over the open kitchen and eating area. 

"You grew up here?"

"I came here often, yes."

Something stirs in him as he watches Levi's figure against his childhood backdrop. He reaches out and holds Levi to his chest. The lieutenant doesn't say anything at first.

"Isn't this disrespectful to do here?" 

"Yes." 

"I don't see you stopping."

"You don't seem to mind." 

Erwin lets him go and switches gears. "I know you're impatient to get moving. Let me discuss my plan with you. I intend to put an end to this informant tomorrow."


	5. Chapter 5

Erwin walks out into the morning fog as he adjusts the cuffs of his shirt. Levi was on the far side of the courtyard staring down at the city, half obscured by clouds. The shrine bell rattles. An elderly woman was praying today. She gets up and takes his arm as he passes. "A word, young man."

“Yes.” He walks her to the stairs. She smiles, showing the wrinkles on her face. 

"You were a great war general in your last life."

"Was I," he comments.

"You sent that man standing there to his death, along with countless others."

Erwin keeps his face impassive. "And what was he to me?" he asks in a low voice of Levi, entertaining her nonsense.

"Your strongest soldier." Erwin continues descending the stone steps. Levi was watching them now, eyebrows furrowed in displeasure.

"Did I watch him die?"

"No. He was far from you."

"Why has he come back to me then?"

"You don't know, general?"

Erwin doesn't say anything. She lets go and bids him farewell with a small smile. He locks the gate and slowly climbs back up, but stops.

"Wait," he says firmly. He couldn't ignore the burning in his heart.

She stops and calls, "You knew he loved you. He died without ever knowing you wanted to be with him."

 

Erwin wakes. Staring up at the unfamiliar ceiling, it takes a moment for his mind to supplement where he is. Levi is sitting nearby against the wall cleaning his knives, the deadly metal sheen reflecting off the moonlight. He pauses briefly as Erwin turns to look at the clock. Four-forty. He lies back heavily, holding onto his dream, of a war that had consumed his heart. Most of it had disappeared from memory, but the elderly woman remained. 

"Nightmare?" Levi asks in a disinterested voice.

Erwin shakes his head. "No."

Levi gets up off the floor, clearly unable to sleep the entire night. "Get up then. We have work to do.”

The lieutenant hides his knives on his person before moving to peer out the window. Erwin sits up slowly. They hadn’t slept next to one another, but Levi had remained close to him regardless. He neatly rolls up the bedding and stands to pull his shirt over his head, changing. Levi’s dark eyes rake over the scars on his arm and upper torso. 

“Were you able to get any rest?” Erwin asks.

“A bit,” he answers shortly. 

Erwin approaches him as he slowly disentangles the sleeves from his arms. Levi remains very still as he meets his lips. He pulls back, feeling his heart twist at their proximity. He was so soft and warm. This Levi didn't want to acknowledge his feelings for him, his dream had reversed their actual roles. 

“Levi, I have a set of documents prepared in the safe in my office downtown. Hange gave me a second copy of your profile detailing your assignment as an undercover officer. She removed everything from the security files at the precinct before the new commissioner assumed control. Isabel and Farlan’s profiles are also with yours.”

Levi nods somberly as he folds his shirt. Hange had been working tirelessly for weeks to break into the system without Shadis’s codes. 

“The safe combination is 14-25-10-12. My will is also in there, along with my account numbers. I put a copy of my office key with your belongings.”

“Do you plan on dying sometime soon?” he bites, deadpanned.

“No, but I want to make sure my affairs are in order so you have what you need if it comes to that.”

Levi stares at him long and hard before brushing past him to walk out the room. Erwin lets him go, gazing down at the place he once stood. He was angry. 

“Get dressed,” he orders sharply from the doorway before disappearing into the darkness. 

Levi sits tense and alert beside him the entire car ride, distracted eyes watching every pedestrian and street corner as they enter the city. The air around him was stifled with conflict, as if he was struggling between keeping Erwin close and abandoning him.

"It's easier to be alone," Erwin supplies, reading his thoughts.

Levi's head snaps up. He feels those fearsome eyes boring into him but keeps his gaze straight ahead, hands calm on the steering wheel. "You won't have to answer for anyone's death."

"Are you talking about me or your wife?" Levi snarls.

Erwin's lips twist as the pain courses sharply through his heart. He doesn't say anything after that, letting the heavy silence linger. Levi turns away to stare out the window.

"Do you resent me?" he asks, voice barely audible.

"Whatever for?" Erwin replies softly.

"For bringing this upon you. I'm trained to kill and operate alone." He turns to look at him. "I can't do this, whatever this is between us, whatever it is you want from me."

"I don't regret anything that's happened. I'll still always be glad I met you."

The lieutenant lets out a ragged breath, one he hadn't realized he'd been holding in. "Why?" he rasps.

"Do you not know?" Erwin asks quietly, meeting his eyes then.

Levi isn't able to answer.

The Lexus picks up a call and the moment passes. Levi visibly changes, eyes becoming hard and distant.

"Erwin, where are you?" Hange demands.

He glances at the dashboard. "About twenty minutes away."

"I sent a second scout last night to track Annie's listed family members. Her father's place was vacant. No one's lived there for years."

"What's the address?" Levi cuts in.

She reads it. Erwin meets his eyes briefly. It was in the heart of gang territory. 

"I have to go. She's here," Hange hisses and hangs up.

"Pull over," Levi directs him as they hit traffic. They had agreed to arrive separately. He quickly inspects the bullets in his gun before clipping it back into place and tucking it behind him.

"I can't promise you I won't kill her. Just don't get in the way if things don't go according to plan."

He's gone before Erwin can say another word.

 

 

"Sergeant Nanaba led your team into the tower armed with assault rifles, am I correct?"

Annie's emotionless eyes don't leave his stare. There was nothing in those blue depths, nothing at all.

"Yes, that's correct." She sat firmly in the chair, back lax against the rest, hands folded beneath the table.

"During a weapons inspection I conducted, it was revealed your rifle hadn't fired any rounds. Please explain."

"My rifle jammed."

"How many people did you encounter when it stopped functioning?"

"I can't recall."

"Fourteen bodies were on the twenty-first floor according to the coroner's office," he reads off his notes. "And how did you manage to defend yourself then, officer?"

"I used my handgun." 

Erwin pauses. She hadn't put forward the firearm for inspection. "And how many people did you shoot with your handgun?"

"I can't recall."

He nods, internalizing the information. "Thank you, officer. We'll break for thirty minutes."

Annie rises immediately and strolls past him out of the room. His skin prickles at their proximity as he pauses the recorder.

Hange looks at him disapprovingly when he enters the adjacent room. "I know why you stopped. None of the bodies had matching bullets for a handgun, Erwin, but she could have just not hit anyone."

"Or she could have used it to corner Keith. Change of plans, I want to see Petra Ral. Something doesn't add up."

Hange nods and picks up the phone, dialing an extension. "Get me Officer Ral."

Petra comes in on the other side a few minutes later. Her expressive eyes follow him when he reenters the room. Erwin turns on the recorder and remains standing this time.

"Please state and spell your name for the record."

She obeys, looking up politely at him. 

"We've discussed the events of last month before, officer, so I'll cut things short. Did anyone's rifle malfunction during the sting?"

Petra blinks. "I don't believe so, sir."

"You fired the most rounds on your team. Can I ask why?"

Petra starts reciting her previous answer. "I was specifically assigned to-" 

She pauses, a thought suddenly occurring to her. "I was injured during the shootout. I didn't have it on me when I was carried out partway, sir, so someone may have used it if theirs malfunctioned." Her face contorts with concern. "I'm sorry, I didn't think of it at the time. Everything happened so quickly."

"Who had a second rifle on them when you regrouped then? Did you notice?"

Petra sits silently, recalling the timeline of her injury. She looks up.

"I saw everyone very briefly, but Officer Leonhardt did."

Erwin glances at his reflection in the glass to signal Hange as a bitter chill descends his body. His eyes were otherworldly, dilated with madness. He didn't recognize himself.

Erwin turns off the recording. 

"Counselor-"

"Stay here," he orders. He leaves Petra's stunned expression, shutting the door behind him. 

Hange catches up to him just as he approaches Annie's desk from behind. That blonde hair. There was no mistaking it now. He takes out his cell phone and keeps it in his hand. Out of the corner of his eye he sees Levi standing slowly from his desk.

"Annie," he calls quietly. She turns her chair to look up cooly at him. Her eyes dart briefly to Hange standing behind him with her gun readied. People nearby were watching now. 

"I'm going to ask you one more time," he says slowly, voice low. "How many people did you shoot with your handgun?"

Everything happens in less than a second. Annie is out of her seat before his body can react. Hange leaps towards the door, both hands on the handle, and fires. The bullets splinter the doorframe just as the ends of her blonde hair disappear from view. Officers seated by the exit duck and yell. Levi is flying after her a second later. Papers littered the floor everywhere.

He hears Hange's voice over the commotion. "Call a code red! Lock it down, lock it down!" 

The alarm sounds as Erwin makes a sharp right past the door to cut her off on the other end. Hange's team immediately follows.

"Are you armed, counselor?" her man shouts. Erwin ignores him, veering left to the outside. "Stay back!" the officer calls after him.

They make their way to the grounds of the precinct, where a high chain-linked fence separated the alley between the buildings. Annie had her knee on the neck of an officer, gun pointed down at his head as Levi stood meters away, threatening to shoot her.

Annie's eyes immediately find his and she gets off the young man in one swift motion, standing to point her gun at him instead, walking to her left. The officer staggers as Levi roughly yanks him up. The surrounding policemen yell at Annie to put her weapon down, firearms aimed. She doesn't budge. Other officers were joining from behind now.

Erwin puts his hands in the air and takes a few steps out, distancing himself from the crowd.

"Take a good look around you, Annie. It's over, give it up." He stops about ten meters from her. "You will be granted a reduced sentence in exchange for your cooperation. You have my word."

She keeps the barrel pointed straight at his head.

"If I go, you go too, counselor. You can join your dear commissioner in hell."

Erwin's jaw tightens. He smiles calmly after a moment. "Enough of my family, what about yours?" 

Annie straightens slightly, eyes widening for a brief second before narrowing dangerously.

"Have you called your father recently?" He shows her the cell phone still in his hand. "I have his number. Shall we talk to him?"

"Don't," she cautions. Erwin keeps both hands in the air and enters the number from memory. 

"Put the phone down, counselor," she warns, pressing urgently this time. He puts the dial-tone on speaker. Erwin can hear his own breathing as everything stills.

An elderly man answers. "Hello?"

Annie's hand goes slack for a split second, eyes wide with horror. Levi takes the opportunity to stand in front of him, his back less than a meter from Erwin's chest, and fires.

Her gun spins into the corner and she clutches her hand, blood all over the ground and dripping from her fingers. She immediately takes a second firearm hidden on her and fires on herself.

"No!" Hange screams. 

Her body falls forward to the ground with a sickening thump. Officers quickly move to secure a perimeter, guns still pointed, as Hange drops on all fours to check Annie's vitals. They radio for the paramedics.

Levi continues to stand in front of Erwin, back to him, breathing heavily. He lowers his gun slowly. "Fuck," he whispers.

 

 

Levi flashes his badge at the armed guards outside the tightly secured hospital room. They let him through and he slowly approaches Erwin, strides noticeably uneven. One of Annie's bullets had grazed his leg, though it didn't look to be serious.

They don't speak at first. Erwin continues watching the monitors as the medical ventilator moves air into and out of Annie's comatose body.

"How did you know her father's number?" Levi asks. His eyes were weary with anger and exhaustion.

"I didn't. I dialed my courier, who I imagine is close to her father's age."

Levi snorts. Erwin watches his bitter reaction in the glass. "She didn't fucking recognize his voice?"

"I assumed they hadn't seen one another in a long time." He looks at her peaceful expression below the thick, bloodied cast keeping her head intact. 

"Glad to see you gambled all our lives on a phone call. I'd hate to see you bet for real."

Erwin's lips twist briefly. "Judging from her reaction, he was probably the one who sent her. I didn't expect the second gun. We needed her for questioning."

Levi's voice turns cold. "How convenient of her. I'm not sure if the guards here are for her or people like me."

Erwin meets his eyes. "She's still useful nonetheless, better alive than dead. Any others that exist will be drawn out by her presence here."

Levi doesn't say anything.

After several minutes, Erwin takes his keys out. "I'm going to pay Keith a visit. Would you like to come with me?"

Levi looks back at Annie, eyes lidded. "...Yeah."

They sit in comfortable silence in the car. Levi stares out the window, watching the red sunset. Erwin parks briefly in front of the flower shop he used to frequent. 

"I got it." Levi gets out before he's able to take off his seat-belt. 

He returns with two bouquets and gives Erwin a pointed look as he places them in the backseat. 

"For your wife," he mutters when he gets in.

Erwin gazes at him and reaches out to gently grasp the side of his neck, bringing him closer. He rests his forehead against his shoulder, feeling both an incredible sadness and terrible love.

 

 

“I’m surprised you agreed to meet. I thought you were angry with me."

“I wasn’t angry.” Erwin sits back a bit into his chair, absently stirring his coffee outside the shop. Marie gives him a tight, but skeptical look from across the table.

“What’s going on then, Erwin?”

“It’s a lot more than I’m able to explain, but the short of it is you were correct.”

He catches the briefest tinge of disappointment in her eyes, but the wistful look is gone almost immediately. She smiles slowly, genuine this time. 

“You’re going to make me blush.”

“Why’s that?”

“I can use my imagination, can’t I?”

Erwin furrows his eyebrows. “It’s not like that.”

“I think it’s completely like that,” Marie says easily over the rim of her glass, smirking. “Can I ask more questions, or will you stop talking to me if I do?”

“You’re enjoying this,” he says impassively, taking a sip.

Marie folds her arms on the table, a little more serious now. “It’s Lieutenant Ackerman, if I’m not mistaken?”

“Captain,” he corrects. “He goes by Levi.” He keeps his face calm. This was the first time he was talking about Levi to someone other than Hange. 

She blinks. “That’s a nice name.” 

Marie looks him over a bit and sighs. “Will you ever formally introduce him to me or will I just have to get myself arrested to talk to him?”

“You’ll have to get arrested.”

“Ass. And why the hell's that?”

“Like I said, it’s not like that.” 

She frowns a bit, worry forming between her brows. “How could you not fall in love with a face like yours,” she jokes ruefully. 

Erwin smiles tightly. "I’d rather not discuss this anymore.”

“Well, I’m happy for you, Erwin, that you've found someone to care for, truly." They stand and Marie kisses both his cheeks, gently gripping his arm in farewell. 

"He'll come around. Everyone always does when it comes to you." Erwin stares after her a bit before returning to his office building. 

Levi is leaning on the railing outside when he leaves work a few hours later. His hair was cut shorter above the collar to meet regulations. Erwin smiles softly and looks him over in admiration, stopping in front of him. “Congratulations, captain.”

Levi glares at him briefly before rolling his eyes. "Just because I shot someone isn’t a reason to get promoted," he mutters darkly.

“Many people would have to disagree with you on that." 

They cut through the park on their way back to the apartment. Levi doesn’t say anything for awhile. He waits. 

"I want to talk to you about something."

Erwin stares straight ahead. “You don't need to be afraid of my reaction," he assures. "I want you to do what makes you happy."

He makes an effort to keep his body language neutral as Levi remains silent beside him, reaffirming what he already knew to be true. 

“I'll be here if you ever need anything. You know that," he says gently.

“Idiot. You're talking as if I'll never see you again. Have you forgotten you're the prosecutor for the prefecture?"

Erwin smiles. “No.”

They walk for a little bit. “Can I ask where you'll go?"

Levi's eyes become distant. “No idea. I've been breathing this shitty air my whole life." He gestures to the city around them. "I think I've had enough of it."

"I understand how you feel. I almost moved north once."

Levi looks up at him, eyes unreadable. Erwin pauses and eventually stops walking. “Work aside, Levi, I don't want to stop seeing you.”

Levi halts and stares defiantly at him. “You sound like you're asking a girl out."

Erwin's lips twist. “Is that a yes or no?"

Levi gives him the finger and continues walking, scowling. Erwin laughs in response and follows.

When they're side by side again, he catches Levi smiling ever so slightly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end of arc one.


	6. Interlude

After the war, the Survey Corps had been tasked with establishing new settlements outside of the Wall. Erwin had sent Hange and Moblit ahead with a team further south while he and Levi stayed behind with the remaining men to finish constructing the newest town. They had spent months building. 

Levi wakes that morning and steps out of the church. It was where the soldiers stayed. He sees Erwin walking with the Lord's daughter who was funding the entire settlement. Watching the two of them side by side, it occurs to Levi that he didn't see a future for himself here any longer. Erwin would probably marry and start a family at some point. He might even send him far away like Hange to build other settlements. He walks away to get working alone at the edge of town. 

At the last light of day, he goes down to the river and sits on the large rocks by the bank. 

"You're rather quiet these days."

Levi turns to see Erwin standing a little ways from him, watching him pensively.

"What's there to say?"

Erwin's lips twist. "Plenty." He joins him. 

They were equals now, old friends even. Levi had followed Erwin for so long, being by his side was only second nature. But Levi realizes now he'd probably lost his usefulness long ago. It would be hard letting this go.

"Are you happy, Levi?" Erwin asks after a while.

"With what?"

"With everything."

Levi snorts. "Why wouldn't I be?" He knows he should be, but all he feels is restlessness.

He drafts a letter of his resignation a week later and gives it to Erwin. His blue eyes stare down impassively at the paper, expression unchanged.

"Where will you go?"

"Like hell I'd know."

Erwin hands it back to him. "I'm no longer in command. I resigned over a month ago. Zackley's official documents should have reached Hange by now as the new commander."

Levi noticed Erwin had stopped wearing his bolo tie around that time. He isn't sure why he hadn't put two and two together until now.

"Lord Baelif's daughter will be overseeing things here. I plan to push further on my own until I reach the end of this expanse, whatever that may look like. If you have nowhere to go, why not join me?"

Levi stares at him for a long time. 

"Don't make me laugh. An one armed man traveling the wilderness alone?"

Erwin just smiles. "At least come with me to see Hange. You can give her your letter."

"... Fine."

They follow the river to Hange's town two days later, taking a third mount with them for supplies. 

Erwin lays on the grass staring at the night sky on the first day, left hand pinning his notebook against his thigh as he draws constellations from a book he once read.

Levi sits nearby next to the fire. "What are you doing?" 

Erwin shows him the paper. "Does it look like an archer?"

Levi studies the points connected by several lines. "It looks like a lot of things. An archer's not one of them."

Erwin laughs a bit. After a moment he sits up and looks at him, eyes unreadable. 

"You seem yourself again."

"Whatever."

Erwin smiles at him in a way that makes his heart twist. He wasn't his commander anymore, just an extraordinary man. Levi decides that night he would help Erwin fulfill his dream to reach the end of the world. 

"Why the hell didn't you tell me you had planned to resign?"

"I knew you would come to me on your own when you were ready."

Levi snorts. "Full of ourselves aren't we."

"I just know you." Erwin lies back down, starry sky reflected in his eyes as he gazes up.

That day at the river... had Erwin been waiting for him to leave?

He would give his letter to Hange. It was really a formality at this point, he knew she would let him leave.

A month later, as they prepare to leave the new town, Levi spots Erwin looking over a map in Hange's office. He stands opposite him to study it, tracing Erwin's pen lines with his eyes.

"Do you think I'm selfish?"

"What's with all the questions nowadays? Getting soft with old age? I think you can do whatever the fuck you want after all the shit we've been through."

"Is this what you want? What do you want, Levi?"

"There's no point in voicing it. You'll just say you knew all along anyways."

"I'd still want to hear it."

Levi just glares at him. "Who's being selfish now?" he retorts.

Erwin smiles softly. 

They reach the ocean a few months later together. Levi stands on the cliff next to Erwin. It was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. The air smelled like salt. They eventually find a way down to the sand.

Erwin crouches and touches the water. They were the first people here. Levi spots an old, abandoned house in the distance and they make their way there by sundown. The two of them had passed many abandoned villages and houses over the course of their journey.

Levi focuses on Erwin's back, watching him observe the red sunset over the watery horizon as they walk. They had reached the end. Where would he go now? 

They sleep on the floor near one another that night. Levi wakes with a fever the next day, ill from the constant wind. Erwin stays next to him as he drifts in and out of sleep. When he wakes again, Erwin's blankets are around him. He was soaking wet from sweat.

Erwin returns to the house and sets down a steaming cup. He had gone to collect freshwater upstream.

"Here, drink this. How do you feel?"

"Fine."

Levi shivers from the cold as he sits up and Erwin prompts him to change to something warmer. He lies beside him that night as he falls out of consciousness. 

Levi isn't sure how it happened but Erwin is huddled close to him the next morning. He starts to move away but Erwin leans closer in his sleep. Levi could feel his breath on his hair, his own face incredibly close to his chest. He feels his heart pain silently as his body tremors of its own accord.

Erwin wakes beside him, concern on his face, and places the back of his hand against his forehead. His skin was warm. Shifting to bring his face at eye level, Erwin studies him.

"Cold?"

Levi shakes his head shortly. Erwin doesn't stop looking at him, hand gently smoothing his damp hair. Levi frowns.

"What are you doing?"

"Looking at you."

"Something on my face, idiot?"

"No."

Erwin brings his forehead closer until they touch. Levi keeps his eyes downcast, heart hammering in his chest. 

"I'm glad I'm here to care for you. All these years..."

Erwin isn't able to finish, but Levi knows what he means. He wasn't able to in this capacity as his commander. Neither of them were. This was the real Erwin, the man he had always known to be there underneath that cold, hard exterior. The man he fell in love with long ago, has loved all this time.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

Levi closes his eyes, committing Erwin's kind voice to memory. It was just for him now. More than anything in the world, he had wanted this.

"Levi."

"Hm?"

"Let me take care of you for the rest of your life."

"You're the one who got partially eaten, not me, stupid."

Erwin gently touches his face, fingers threading through his hair. "I realize my recklessness has been a source of suffering for you. I'm sorry."

"We both did what we needed to do. The titans are gone, aren't they?"

"Yes, they are."

Erwin just lies with him in silence after that.

"It's this."

Erwin searches his eyes, inquiring him to continue.

"This is what I want."

He doesn't say anything, just brings Levi closer and holds him. 

"I'm sorry you had to die. I'm sorry, Levi. I wish all of this could have been true."


	7. Levi's Rising

Levi wakes in the psychologist's office, his vision a watery blur. He blinks and sits up slowly, realizing where he is. His psychologist looks up from her desk and studies him from across the room.

"Levi," she calls.

Keeping outwardly calm despite his raging heart, he runs a hand over his face. It was damp. 

"Your employer will add sessions if you continue to use them to sleep," she admonishes disapprovingly.

"Their money, not mine," he mutters as he stands. His throat was dry.

"Why is this the only place you can sleep?"

Levi chooses not to answer. For the briefest of seconds, he considers telling her about his twisted dream, but quickly pushes the thought aside. He grabs his jacket from the armrest as she picks up a pen to start writing him another prescription for his sleeping pills. The psychologist is barely able to hold it out when he snatches it from her fingers. 

"Until next week then. I'll be here when you're ready to talk."

Levi furrows his eyebrows as he wordlessly slips past the double doors.

His lashes are still wet when he steps out into the bright afternoon sun. He stares up directly at it and thinks of Erwin.

His cell rings. 

"Petra."

"Captain, I'm sorry to interrupt your lunch break. The target is on the move. The commissioner has given the executive order."

"Got it. I'm heading back now."

He crosses the intersection a few blocks later, flashes his badge at the officers manning the metal detectors, and quickly descends the stairs to the basement of the precinct. Eld was already gearing up. 

"Sir," he greets. 

Levi nods and makes his way to his locker to change into a tactical uniform, securing a bulletproof vest over his torso and a gun to his thigh. He slips on a black balaclava to cover his face and straps a helmet over it, then dons his gloves before taking out an assault rifle, clipping the rounds in place. 

Petra and Marist are waiting in the vehicle when he gets in after Eld. Titus lies obediently on the ground wearing a vest, ears perked forward. Marist pats the black German Shepherd in reassurance as the doors close. Levi rests his rifle atop his thigh and pulls his mask down. "Status," he orders, as they start moving. 

"Sir, Rod Reiss was seen entering the government headquarters for a meeting. We will be intercepting him there. Team B is on site standing by for your arrival," Petra says.

Levi pulls his goggles down from his helmet when its radioed that Reiss is emerging from the ground floor. Titus barks viciously in the lobby, saliva dripping from his jaws as he lunges forward on the leash.

His men quickly subdue Reiss's bodyguards to the ground, shouting at them to lie face down with their hands behind their heads.

Eld cuffs Reiss as the latter demands for his lawyer. Underneath his mask, Levi sneers. They were going after the prolific gang members he had gathered evidence against. Now that he was reinstated, he would arrest every last one of them. Levi stays back as the B team cleans up the scene.

Petra gets off the phone and moves to stand by his side. "Captain, the prosecutor's office is being made aware of Reiss's arrival." 

Levi feels his chest tighten at the mention of Erwin.

"Sir?"

"Right. ... Let's go."

It had been a month since he'd last seen the other man. They corresponded through short texts, but Erwin was giving him space. 

When they return to police headquarters, Levi gets to work right away, drafting his reports at his desk. Nifa arrives at the special assault team's facilities with paperwork about an hour later. 

Levi grimaces slightly when he realizes it has Erwin's signature. 

"From the office of the prosecutor, sir."

"Yeah, I got that," he bites. 

She gives him a small, lopsided smile. 

"What's blondie got to say?" he asks, looking over the documents.

"He's negotiating sentence terms for Reiss's cooperation." 

Levi twists the corner of his mouth briefly. "We'll see if he breaks."

"If Erwin can't get him to talk, I'm not sure anyone else can, sir."

Levi stares up at her, deadpanned. "What are you, part of some fan-club?" he inquires darkly as he signs the forms.

A light blush forms over her cheeks. "N-no," she stammers.

"Stop looking so starry-eyed and get out of here," he admonishes tiredly. She takes the papers and smiles sheepishly.

"Yes, sir!"

Levi sits back into his chair once he's alone. He rests a leg over his knee and shoves his hands into his pockets.

Things had quickly escalated between them. Compounded by their circumstances and living under his roof, Erwin had paid attention to every detail about him. He couldn't pinpoint when exactly Erwin had decided he wanted to cross the line from strictly professional to something else, but would be dishonest if he didn't acknowledge that the attraction, at least physical at first, had been mutual. To this day, Levi still couldn't understand why. Why he cared, why it had to be him. They had slept together immediately afterwards.

He wanted to take control of his life. It wasn't going to happen living in Erwin Smith's world. 

It's dark outside when Levi takes the elevator to the sixth floor to submit his report. He stops dead in his tracks when he sees Erwin behind the glass wall, in a meeting with the commissioner. He ignores the tremor that runs from his chest to his groin and sits heavily into one of the chairs lining the wall, keeping his eyes downcast.

It's a few minutes later when Erwin turns to exit towards him. For the briefest second, he catches his blue eyes laden with exhaustion and emotional toil. When he looks up and their eyes meet, it's masked again. Seeing him after all this time, his height, that cool, discerning stare, Levi feels both divested and shielded all the same. It was a conflicting emotion. 

Erwin slows to a stop a few meters from him and smiles briefly, keeping his features calm and professional. 

"Good evening, captain."

The commissioner appears at the door. 

"Levi, give me ten minutes. I have to take this call, it's the superintendent's office."

"Sir," he acknowledges shortly. The commissioner closes the door, picks up the phone, and sits on his desk, back to them.

Erwin takes a seat, three chairs away from him he notes, and leans his head back against the wall, staring out the glass into the darkness.

"How have you been?" 

"Fine."

"I hear you've garnered quite a reputation." 

Levi scoffs. "Keeping you busy?"

Erwin smiles tiredly. "Perhaps. You did well today."

He watches as Erwin lowers his gaze to his hands. He did that sometimes. Levi glances at the place his wedding ring used to be before adverting his eyes. He was pretty sure Shadis hadn't had this in mind, his most trusted officer and his dispassionate son-in-law fucking when he had asked him to live with Erwin.

"Are you done after this?"

"Yeah."

"I'm going to meet with Hange. Stop by when you're finished here."

He gets up before Levi can answer and walks towards the elevators.

 

Levi takes the stairwell down to the second floor, letting the cold air clear his thoughts. Erwin is leaning back on Hange's desk, arms crossed, talking to her. 

Levi had spent days with Hange looking into the identity of Annie's father. He didn't see a physical resemblance to any of the faces he'd seen before and concluded that her father may have been in the upper circles, or may not have even been biologically related at all. Nothing out of the ordinary had occurred since then. With each passing day, Levi was growing more restless. 

Hange sees him and smiles. She immediately stands and gathers some papers from her desk.

"I'll let you and Erwin catch up, I've actually got a meeting soon." 

"This late?" Levi inquires, disinterested. 

She waves brightly and hurriedly parts ways with them.

Erwin gazes at him. "Walk with me a bit."

Levi stops in the basement to change back into his street clothes. Erwin is waiting for him in the lobby, just having gotten off the phone with someone.

Everything falls right back into place as they make their way out of the precinct. It was the first time in weeks he felt at ease, beside a familiar presence.

"Are you free an evening next week?"

For all the things Erwin kept to himself, which was damn near everything, being forward with Levi wasn't one of them. He slows his strides.

"Whatever you want to say, you can say right now. My team takes the night shift starting Monday."

Erwin smiles a bit. "It seems we won't be crossing paths anymore then."

Levi frowns at the way he says that. "Idiot. I'm free right now." Piercing blue eyes turn to study him. "Unless you have somewhere else to be, I'm starving. Hurry up and make a decision." 

Erwin's lips twist slightly. Levi realizes he had been walking with him towards the direction of his apartment. 

"I'm afraid I don't have much in terms of food, but I do need to see Kit off tonight."

"Whatever. It's fine."

Feelings of nostalgia wash over him when he sees the large German Shepherd again. Aside from the coloring, he had a different personality than Titus, was older, calmer. Kit whines, tail flailing, and doesn't allow Levi past the foyer, seeking his attention. Erwin moves ahead into the living room, loosening his tie, and tosses his suit jacket over the back of the sofa in the process. Levi bends down on one knee to smooth the dog's ears. 

"Miss me, you mutt?" he murmurs.

The apartment looked and smelled the same. Watching Erwin go about the kitchen, his own hands running through Kit's thick fur, he's suddenly gripped with a feeling of belonging he thought he'd long forgotten. 

He couldn't stop himself from thinking he was somehow supposed to be here too.

Erwin boils a bag of frozen dumplings, the only thing he probably had in his refrigerator. Glancing down at his watch, he tells him absently, "Mike will be here sometime this hour. He's already eaten."

"Okay."

After putting out a can of wet meat for Kit, Erwin takes out his smallest bowl and starts mixing various sauces as an accompaniment. He stands back afterwards and produces a low laugh at their meal. Levi joins him at the kitchen island.

"Apologies," he says, pushing loose hair away from his face. A few blonde strands fall back over his eyes regardless. 

"I couldn't give more of a shit." He had an aversion to public places Erwin knew about, but neither of them ever voiced it aloud. He nods and doesn't say anything after that. They eat in relative silence at first.

"What did that fucker Reiss say?"

"Some interesting information about his work." 

Though he shouldn't have been surprised, as this was Erwin they were talking about, Levi still asks sharply, "How?"

"Apparently, the newest bodyguards are not acquainted with Reiss's lawyer."

"So you pretended to be him. I see even you bend the rules."

"I implied." Erwin meets his eyes. "It's important you stay away from Rod, Levi."

"You don't need to tell me that." He had only been in the same room once with Reiss as an undercover officer, but wasn't about to test the old bastard's memory. All of the bodyguards were new faces to him. Erwin had moved Rod to solitary confinement for the time being. 

Levi eventually sets his bowl aside, lining his utensil neatly over it. 

"Are you acquainted with your new location?" Erwin asks, taking everything off the counter and turning his back to him in the process to rinse the dishes. 

"Getting there." Levi didn't like where the conversation was headed. 

"I'm glad. It's less hectic than it is here I presume."

He doesn't answer. Erwin isn't looking for one either because he doesn't turn back around. Kit bops his nose against his outer thigh, then rests his chin atop his knee. Levi puts a hand over his head, feeling the ridges of his cranium.

"When is this coworker's kid going to pop out? They might as well give you the mutt, he's here all the time."

"He asked me once."

"What? To keep?"

"Yes. I actually thought he'd be better off with you."

Levi's hand stops. Erwin doesn't turn around.

"As much as I've come to care about him, he's not suited here with me."

Erwin's body language doesn't change as Levi stares hard at him. He was partially talking about him. Levi lowers his gaze to the retired police dog, a storm of emotions in his chest. So Erwin would be alone again. Was that what bothered him the most?

"You can think about it. It'll be another two months before they'll want an answer from me." Erwin finally looks up and stands silent for a moment, watching their interactions. "He knows you're like him."

"Jaded?" Levi asks darkly.

"A police officer."

Erwin's house-line rings. He ignores it and moves to retrieve Kit's leash. 

"I'll meet him in the lobby. You're welcome to anything here."

Erwin bends down to secure the German Shepherd, who was still against his leg. Levi resists the sudden urge to shift away from him, feeling his body go tense at their proximity. Erwin notices too because he looks up, cool, composed eyes on him. Damn the bastard for being so good-looking. He gently lifts his chin to kiss him. It was foreign and familiar all the same. Levi's side hits the edge of the counter as it deepens.

His cell rings this time. Levi pulls back. "I'm using your shower."

"That's fine," he whispers.

His toothbrush is still in the master bath, propped up beside Erwin's. Why had he kept this old thing? Levi tosses it into the wastebasket and rummages for a new one. He's in the shower when Erwin joins him. The other man places a warm hand on his hip and kisses his neck from behind. 

In his bed that night, Erwin hovers over him, looking at him like he's just too much, like no one's ever looked at him before.

"Have you been with anyone?" he asks quietly, touching his face.

"What the hell do you think?" Levi whispers, pulling him closer. Erwin smiles ruefully.

 

 

It's laying in his arms, warm, out of breath afterwards, that Levi feels compelled to address something that's been bothering him.

"I'm not doing this with anyone, idiot," he grunts into his chest.

Erwin threads a hand through his hair, making him shiver, and holds him tightly. Levi knows he should leave, but can't seem to bring himself to move. Sleep quickly takes him.

Dim white light filters the bedroom when they have sex again. He's on his side when Erwin kisses his neck and rolls him onto his stomach. Levi fists the sheets as he's thrusted deeply into. Erwin holds his hip in one hand, his other arm across his chest. He eventually stops before they climax and kisses his shoulder. He didn't want it to end. Levi moans when Erwin pulls out and turns him around, reentering slowly, his hands holding his face and moving down his body to spread his legs.

"Fuck..." he hears himself breathe.

Levi wraps his legs around his waist and ruts himself forward, tortured by the slowed pace. Erwin closes his eyes briefly, groaning shortly, before slamming into him. Levi's arms grasp his shoulders as he comes on his stomach, clinging to him. 

Erwin is breathing hard into his neck afterwards. As exhaustion takes him, Levi vaguely registers that this was what he had wanted in his dream. How deeply devoted he had been to that Erwin, had loved him so much and all he had ever wanted was to be with him. He would have followed him anywhere, until all his dreams and aspirations became fulfilled, until Levi could finally see him smile. Erwin had left his rank for him, travelled the ends of the world with him, would be his and his alone. For as long as they lived they could be together.

Levi was never one to weep, but he had never felt so much sorrow and despair laying next to Erwin in his dream. The man had been everything to him. He must have died a horrid, wretched death. It had all been wishful thinking, all in his head.

 

Levi hadn't expected to end up staying with him. He didn't have a change of clothes. Erwin had memorized his habits, putting his things in the wash. Not that he needed them, they had spent most of the day in his bed anyways.

He realizes there was no one who knew him better than Erwin, perhaps the only person who really knew him at all. The way Erwin would stroke his hair, send shivers down his spine until he buried his face against him. The way he watched over him until he slept. Over and over again they cycled. He knew Erwin missed him, didn't want this to end. But he remains quiet, doesn't voice any of it.

Levi could tell he was staying up late every night. The office was an organized disaster. It was the only room the housekeeper didn't go in. Levi takes the two empty glasses of whiskey from the desk to the sink. The refrigerator was empty save for alcohol. He throws out the half empty bottles. Erwin didn't care to take care of himself now that Levi was gone, he had mostly done it for him.

Erwin approaches him in the kitchen and leans close. "Stay the night."

"I already did. I don't have a change of clothes."

"Wear mine then."

"They're too fucking huge."

"Stay," Erwin whispers, kissing him.

Levi obliges in the end. He didn't want to admit that part of him that had missed this, missed him. When he returns to the office to wipe down the ring marks on the wooden surface, he spots a letter face up on one of the piles.

His hand hesitates over it.

Erwin had been offered a job up north.


	8. Levi's Rising

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, a huge shout out to this lovely artist for depicting this scene from Chapter 1! Just beautiful :) Thank you for the love! 
> 
> http://0gouki.tumblr.com/post/119685983725/levi-sits-on-the-wall-with-one-leg-up-staring

Levi's memory immediately takes to the contents of the letter. There were MLS listings underneath the job offer. Erwin appears at the doorway.

"It's not the first time I've been head-hunted. My broker is sending me information about the area."

"Higher pay?" Levi asks distantly, putting down the papers.

Erwin gestures to his apartment. "I don't need money."

"Then, what do you need?"

His calm expression doesn't change. "Isn't it obvious?" 

He slowly approaches and stands centimeters from him. Levi could feel the heat from his body.

"Look at me."

Erwin reaches out and gently touches his face, turning his chin towards him. Levi lifts it to stare at him.

"I won't take the job."

"You can do whatever the fuck you want."

"Yes, but I won't," he says again, softer this time, and leans forward to meet his lips.

Levi fists his collar to push him away, but feels his own body responding to his mouth. Why Erwin seemed entirely convinced that they were right for one another, he would never know. He bites his lip hard in retaliation. Erwin grunts shortly and twists his head away, pushing his hips back against the edge of the desk. Their mouths meet again and Levi struggles internally to keep him at a distance. 

What if things could always be like this? If he were to wake up next to this man, the only one who gave a damn about anything he ever did, anywhere he went, who wanted to hear all of it, everyday. 

"Erwin."

"Yes?" he murmurs against his cheek.

"Tell me more about it."

Erwin searches his eyes. After a moment, he thumbs the corner of his lips tenderly and pulls away.

"All right."

He takes a seat and enters the passcode on his laptop, bringing the screen to life. He doesn't bother shielding the numbers.

1-2-2-4. 

Christmas Eve. 

Levi wonders if there is any significance to the numbers. Erwin proceeds impassively to a secured folder.

"When I was a child, I had frequent dreams about the ocean. In it, I stood alone on a cliff, waiting for someone." He sits back, staring straight ahead. "For years I waited. It wasn't until I was old enough that I realized the person I was waiting for was probably long dead."

Levi leans further into the desk, listening.

"My last memory of my father was of him taking me north to see the jagged cliffs. It was cold that day. Though I could barely make out the water, I could hear the waves crashing below. When we arrived, he asked me if this was what I saw in my dream. I lied and told him yes."

Erwin's eyes lid somberly. "My father was detained the next day at his workplace for conspiring with operatives in the north. He and several others had tried to overthrow a government official with deep gang ties. I never saw him again."

"You want to find the man responsible for his death."

"I already did. He's long dead."

"Why then?"

Erwin shakes his head slightly. "I lied that day. I never did know if it was me that had brought him north to his death, or his own personal agenda. Would you laugh if I told you I wanted that place to be the one I saw in my dream?"

Levi stares at him. After a moment, he exhales slowly. "You're an idiot."

Erwin smiles easily, his eyes dark. "Perhaps."

"What's stopped you all these years?"

"My wife and her family resided here." 

Levi's fingers grip the edge of the desk. "Nothing's stopping you now."

Erwin looks up at him. Levi returns his stare before lowering his gaze to the screen. The job was a lateral move. A considerable salary increase, given that houses in the area were more affordable.

"Either way, you should give them your reply. It's been a week."

Erwin moves closer to the desk, nodding. "I'll do it now."

"Good. I'm going to see what I can make out of your pathetic excuse for a pantry."

Erwin smiles a bit. "You have a heart of iron."

 

Levi snaps awake when Erwin's cell rings. He's lying face down, arms buried underneath the pillow. He slowly turns his head when he feels Erwin's weight leave the mattress, watching his perfectly proportioned figure move towards the dresser.

It was Mike. Erwin picks up his watch, then stares down stoically at the wooden surface as he engages in a work-related conversation. Levi closes his eyes, feeling himself drift off. 

Erwin returns a few moments later and quietly apologies. Levi's too exhausted to answer. He rolls onto his side languidly, allowing him some room. Erwin settles over him instead. 

"You're quite the messy sleeper," he murmurs in a low voice, snaking a hand underneath the covers. Levi arches up when his fingers wrap around his cock.

"Bastard... How are you still horny?" he rasps, voice rough with sleep.

"You make me this way."

Levi's breath hitches as he hardens in his grasp. Erwin's blue eyes watch him with an intensity that's somewhere between hunger and amusement. He leans up into his hand as he's stroked faster, hips leaving the bed to match each stride. God, it was so fucking good.

"Let me hear your voice."

"Shut up," he breathes. He throws his head back when Erwin replaces his fingers with a hot, wet mouth instead. 

"Fuck..." Firm hands hold him down as he's licked from base to tip. Levi spreads his legs when he gets close and Erwin gets the hint, flipping him onto his stomach.

"I'm not going to use protection," he murmurs. They had stopped using condoms yesterday.

Levi buries his face into an arm. "Just put it in already."

He was loose from earlier that night, but groans when Erwin enters. He gradually loses control of his voice as his hips are pounded harder and harder into the mattress, pain quickly replaced by a deep pleasure. As he imagines the whorish sight he must have been at that moment, Erwin firmly closes a hand over his own, interlocking their fingers. He leans down and gently kisses his neck, breathing steadily into his ear, his long body blanketing him. The sensation is sensitive enough to send him over the edge. Erwin grunts softly as he empties himself into him in response. 

Levi shivers uncontrollably and fists the sheets, riding out each arousing brush against his prostate. He moans into the pillow as Erwin continues rolling his hips into him, slower, mercilessly, holding him down as he tries to stop him. 

"Uhh... fuck..."

God, he felt like he was going to die. No one had ever exhausted him mind and body like this. He locks eyes with their hands, still tightly entwined. 

The heat connecting their hands. 

This sex wasn't casual. Before he'd even realized it, Erwin had taken a step closer, setting foot to a place inside his heart no one should have been allowed to enter. Levi remains at a loss as Erwin cradles his face. Just what was he supposed to do with all the other things that came with it?

He remembers Isabel and Farlan. The last time anyone had meant something to him, they ended up dead.

"What's wrong?" Erwin murmurs against him, watching his expression.

"Nothing."

"Levi."

He looks up. His blue eyes seem to drill a hole right through him, but he holds the rawness of the stare. It changes, as if he wanted to tell Levi something at that moment, but decided against it. Perhaps Erwin knew he was forgetting one important thing. 

Levi was afraid of him.

He was pushing him as fast and as hard away from him as he was pulling him closer. 

"I'll wait for you," he whispers, "Run all you need."

Levi's reminded of that day on his sofa and closes his eyes. He didn't deserve this.

"Levi."

Levi's eyes snap open to Erwin's face as the other man's cell rings again. He watches the slight furrow that forms between his brows and the hardness that sets into his expression. It was well past midnight now. Erwin rolls away from him and stands, moving in front of the dresser. He immediately answers after reading the caller.

"Hange."

Levi slowly sits up as Erwin listens intently. He locks eyes with him and puts the phone on speaker, taking a seat on the edge of the bed next to him.

"-the two officers are now missing. We have a man in custody, a high profile member of a rival gang."

"Got it. I'm on my way."

"I'm going to contact Levi. The timing of this... Something doesn't seem right."

Erwin's gaze travels silently up to his face, letting him make the decision. 

Levi gets out of bed, retrieving his clothes from the floor and exhales slowly. He didn't give a shit anymore.

"I'll be there," he answers roughly.

Erwin stares down impassively at the phone in his lap as Hange pauses on the line. She recovers quickly.

"See you soon then."

 

 

As they pull up to tower one, Levi leans forward in the passenger's seat to peer up at the lights lining each floor. It was still under construction. They stop at the brigade of police cars blocking the site entrance, the blue lights whirling shadows against the scattered building materials. 

Levi gets out of the car. He grips the top of the door, grimacing internally at the pain. The night air was cool against his skin and he lets it numb him. The paramedics were here, a sign of bodies.

"What floor?"

"Thirtieth," Erwin answers.

Investigation wasn't his team's responsibility. Nevertheless, he dons a surgical mask to partially shield his face and stalks past the police barrier towards the elevators. 

Hange quickly looks them up and down when they arrive. Mike was already there. Levi had never met him officially, so they part ways. His height made Erwin appear almost average beside him. Hange steps away from the small throng of investigators and medics and walks him towards the back of the building. They pass two body bags.

"Let's start here." 

Markers on the ground indicated a clear struggle.

"Officers Hoover and Braun responded to an anonymous call from the building at approximately ten-fifty." 

She gestures to the blood marks on the ground, showing that they came from the bodies. "These two were known associates of Dimo Reeves. We arrested him at his house about an hour ago unarmed. He claims no involvement in the matter."

"How convenient."

Levi searches for traces of cameras and ends up locking eyes with Erwin across the room, as he'd received the same piece of information that exact moment.

"Get someone to guard Reeves. The press will be quick to skewer him."

Hange nods. "IA will have to tread carefully. The superintendent's making a statement to address the officers' family members and press this morning."

"You think they set this up."

"I don't think anything. It seems an awfully odd thing to do, to disappear, given their immaculate records, but stranger things have happened. Moblit's reviewing their family histories and personnel files. I sent others to comb the abandoned car and their lockers."

"I know who they are." Levi looks down at the body bags. "Figure out if the bullets are police issued first."

"There may have been several men to subjugate the officers. The commissioner is convinced Reeves is lying."

"What could they want with two policemen?" Levi bites.

"That's the ultimate question here."

They review a few more details before Levi returns to the ground floor to study the bodies more closely with the coroner in the ambulance. The sticky sweet smell of iron coats the air.

He looks up as a news van pulls on site. Erwin and Mike were talking with the commissioner in the distance.

Levi stands to leave without another word. 

"Let me give you a ride," Hange says beside him all of a sudden. "I'll drop you off at the train station."

"Not interested."

"We're going in the same direction. Please, Levi. Not at this hour."

He could feel Erwin's gaze on him now over the commissioner's shoulder. Levi wordlessly moves to get into Hange's car and catches her giving Erwin an apologetic smile before joining him inside.

Heavy silence falls over them during the drive. Levi stares out distantly at the lampposts lining the freeway, resting his head against the side. The night sky glowed a shade of orange before fading into black.

"How long?" Hange asks softly as they cross the bridge.

Levi doesn't answer at first. "Does it matter?"

She glances at him through her thick glasses. "No, I suppose it doesn't."

After a moment, she tries again. "Can I tell you a story?" 

Hange takes his silence as agreement. She starts slowly.

"I've known Erwin for a long time. Over the years, I've seen a fair number of women proposition him, and I've watched him decline each and every one of them. There was a time Keith came out of his office and I accidentally overheard a conversation between them. They were at the end of the hall and didn't know I was around the corner. Keith told him enough, that his actions showed the kind of admirable man he was, but he needn't do this. Erwin only smiled the kind of smile that didn't reach his eyes. It's a look I haven't forgotten, even after all these years."

"... What's your point?" Levi asks quietly.

"If the way Erwin treats you is any indication of how he loved his wife, it's no wonder he had chosen to be alone after her death. Perhaps that's what added to his appeal, that he was unattainable. But I noticed something changed that day he saw you take the light-rail to the ocean. I distinctly remember his voice being different. I didn't understand it at the time, but it kind of all makes sense now, and explains why he's been distant this past month."

She slows to a stop in front of the train station and pulls the car into park. "I've seen both of you go through a lot of shit. Think carefully about where you're living right now, Levi."

He narrows his eyes angrily at her before getting out. "Mind your fucking business."

"Levi," she calls, but he was already too far ahead to listen.


	9. Levi's Rising

Levi tips over the prescription bottle until two pills roll into his palm. He takes them and downs a glass of water. Gripping the edge of the table in slight pain, he slumps into the kitchen chair and leans his head back in exhaustion. It hurt, and he needed to shower. The smell of Erwin was all over him. 

His gray eyes distantly wander the ceiling of the apartment. There was no warmth here, only the hollow hum of the appliances reverberating the walls. He lowers his gaze to the firearm laid out on the table and thinks of the two body bags.

The three spokes of death, secrecy, and redemption controlled his life. Over and over they dictated his actions, one after the other, wheeling him ever closer to his own demise and destruction. He shouldn’t have involved Erwin personally, shouldn’t have gone back. 

Even knowing this, the heaviness in his heart still settled in. The day Erwin stood at the bottom of those worn steps, looking up at him from in front of his wife’s childhood home. What had he been thinking then? 

Levi should have walked away. He was sure now he may be in love with Erwin.

He opens Shadis's laptop and uses the old man's passcode to remotely enter the police database. Reading over Dimo Reeve's profile, then Bertolt and Reiner’s, he notes that the two officers had graduated the same year as the traitor. Seething in quiet rage, he peels off his clothes and showers, collapsing face down onto the bed as the first signs of daybreak approach. His body was giving into the drugs, but his mind was still very much racing, straining to fight the darkness.

The sun is low in the sky when Levi wakes. He dresses and stands out in the cool air against the railing, letting the sleeping aides wear off. It calmed him being away from the city. There was no risk of being recognized by anyone out here. He breathes the free air deeply and watches his breath form wispy strands in the afternoon light. The gold streaks in the sky reminded him of the color of Erwin's hair. 

The elderly lady renting the second story of the flat enters the gates. Levi watches as she struggles to carry a large grocery bag and resists rolling his eyes.

"Don't hurt yourself, grandma. Give it to me."

She startles for a second before smiling as he takes the bag without waiting for her reply, stalking ahead up the stairs.

Levi waits for her to unlock the door. His eyes quickly survey the inside and the cluttered kitchen table near the entrance. A plastic basin of trimmed water-spinach leaves, piles of mail, vitamin bottles, ginseng in a used wine glass, potholders, and other miscellaneous items littered the surface. The rest of the apartment was in no better shape. He frowns at the mess as he sets down the bag and starts to walk out.

"I'm glad you moved downstairs. What's your name?"

He hesitates. Lying was second nature. His tongue had forgotten his given name over the years.

"Levi."

She tells him hers. He keeps his expression the same, already knowing the identities and backgrounds of every resident on the street.

"Would you believe me if I told you I used to be able to lift people as a nurse?"

Levi huffs quietly. "I'm sure."

"Well, thank you. Let me know if you need anything. I have some vegetables I grow in the back, I'll bring you some."

"That's not necessary." He turns and descends the stairs. 

The commute back into the city was one and a half hours each way, but he didn’t mind the silence. It gave him time to think.

The new commissioner had called an emergency meeting. Hange's team was one of three involved with investigating the two missing police officers. Lawyers had also been brought in that morning to deal with the ongoing press coverage.

Eld is sipping coffee, sitting with one long leg to each side of the bench running the length of the locker room. He's staring up at Erwin’s televised reel. Levi grimaces internally and shrugs out of his jacket, tossing it loudly onto the bench. Eld immediately shifts to face him and sits a bit straighter. 

“Captain.”

“Turn that off."

Eld nods. “Sir.”

As part of the city governor’s initiative to increase police presence, his team was charged with circulating the busiest metropolitan areas fully armed. This included the airport, central station, and select financial and government buildings. 

“There’s a second layer to our duties tonight,” he tells Eld. 

 

Standing light on his feet, rifle lowered, Levi carefully watches each passenger boarding the crowded metro entrance underneath his mask. Marist leads Titus through the frequented light rail, letting the black dog search out the scents of Bertolt and Reiner. All K-9 units were outfitted with their belongings and specific orders to prompt the dogs to detect their presence. 

“Clear.”

Petra and Eld step off the rail on the other end. 

“Clear.” 

Levi holds his hand up to the engineer to proceed and the man nods in confirmation. 

“Captain, a train is coming in on the E line ETA two minutes. Shall Eld and I proceed?” Petra asks over the com. 

“Go.” 

His team was efficient, but Petra in particular stood out to him. She was the deadliest shooter on the police force despite her age, and had a reputation for being loyal, polite, and focused. Levi heard it was her deposition that Erwin walked out of the day he confronted Annie. 

Petra had put in for a transfer afterwards, asking for Levi by name. Though he could never voice it aloud, he understood the quiet that would fall over her sometimes. There was a determination in her eyes that the others lacked, of having been betrayed by a close comrade.

Levi separates from the others and makes his way to the hospital near the end of the shift, still heavily armed. The sun was rising now. All medical personnel quickly move out of his way as he proceeds down the hall. He had posted Gunther and Oluo permanently at Annie's hospital, increasing security with the disappearances of Bertolt and Reiner. 

His visits had lessened, as it was clear now she wouldn't be waking. Staring at her pale, peaceful expression reminded him of Keith’s old face. The state of his mentor's dead body had resulted in a closed-casket funeral. It made Levi want to rip out the breathing tube in her throat.

"Sir, I'm afraid this is a restricted area."

Levi looks up to see Oluo and Gunther standing in front of Mike, assault weapons raised to chest level. They followed his orders well. No one aside from the attending nurse and physician were to go near her. Be especially weary of those in uniform, he had warned. Mike locks eyes with Levi.

"I'm from the prosecutor's office."

"Leave us."

"Sir." Both men move aside.

"Mike Zacharius." He holds out his hand. Levi doesn't take it.

"What do you want?"

Mike produces a low chuckle. "Erwin mentioned you had a way of speaking about you, captain." He lowers his hand. Mike was even taller in person, and though well dressed, had a rough, unpolished look about him. 

“I have to thank you for getting Rod Reiss for us.”

“Don't be so familiar. I didn’t do it for you.”

“Of course. I’m sure you heard Erwin dropped the petty charges this morning holding Dimo Reeves in exchange for information on Reiss."

Levi had heard. Dimo was an opportunist and an even shrewder businessman. He wouldn't miss the chance to take out the rivaling Reiss family if given one. There was little to no evidence holding him to the cellar.

“I'm looking for the report from the doctors,” Mike continues. 

Levi hands him the manila envelope. The other man undoes the tie and takes out the documents, scanning each paper briefly. Levi looks back at the life support machine.

"I heard you were the one that saved Erwin's life."

"He saved himself with that moronic stunt."

"That's not how he recounts it." Mike flips to the last page. "Seems you've made quite an impression. Erwin never talks highly of anyone."

Levi snorts. "What are you getting at?"

Mike shrugs. "Just interested to know what type of person you are. I've worked in the prosecutor's office for a long time, and find it strange that this is the first time we've met." He gives him a pointed look. "Where did you work previously again?"

"Up north."

Mike arches an eyebrow slightly, but doesn't press on. He reseals the envelope. "No known relatives have stepped forward?"

"No."

Mike's phone pings. He takes it out and looks down. Levi studies him carefully as he glances at Annie.

"Reiss is hinting that he knows her," he murmurs.

"From Erwin?"

"Yeah," he says distractedly, scrolling through the conversation. "I can smell blood in the water. We're getting close."

"You should watch your back," Levi replies darkly. It was a dangerous game Erwin was playing.

Back at the precinct, he changes out of his tactical uniform and closes the locker louder than necessary. Eld eyes him wearily but choses to remain silent. Levi had no reason to seek out Erwin or Reiss professionally. He couldn't show his face.

"See you tomorrow, sir."

"Yeah," he answers more calmly. "... You did well today."

Eld smiles a bit and bows his head in brief thanks.

Levi shields his face in the bright morning light. He descends the stairs of the main entrance and slows to a stop. Erwin's car was parked across the street. His eyes wander the unmistakable M5.

"Captain."

He turns to see Erwin standing at the top of the steps, a hand on the railing. Levi's breathing quickens under the other man's lidded gaze, feeling his abdomen tighten as he closes in. Erwin was attractive and sharply dressed as always.

They walk in the same direction at first. Erwin glances down at his watch as he proceeds towards the street corner and stops at the crosswalk. Levi moves to part ways.

"I have a few hours before my next meeting," he calls. Calm blue eyes evenly meet his stoic stare. "Care to join me for a word or two?"

"Pass." 

"Indulge me," he says, firmer.

Levi's eyes dart to the precinct entrance, jaw clenching. He follows. Erwin unlocks the BMW and makes his way to the driver's side of car. Levi sinks heavily into the leather.

"Where are we going?" he asks impassively as they pick up speed.

"I'll drive you back."

"You're going the wrong way."

"The address you sent me last month was eastbound, am I correct?"

Erwin wasn't taking him to the train station. "It's an hour drive each way, asshole," he hisses through his teeth, enunciating each word.

"Like I said, I have a few hours."

"You don't have anything better to do?" he demands.

Erwin wanted to see where he lived. He hadn't extended the invitation and probably never planned to. They ascend the highway.

"I should have done this yesterday."

Levi leans back with a huff. "You're persistent."

"You don't seem to mind."

It was true. He never did reject Erwin, but he didn't accept him either. He just let things happen. 

Levi keeps his anger in check and leans to the side, watching the clouds reflected against the surface of the car in the side-view mirror. He decides to get right to the point. 

"You've put a fat target on your back, letting that pig free."

Erwin's listless smile betrays his collected expression. "I do what I must, just as you do."

"It was a setup then."

"I believe Dimo has more reason to keep an open eye at night than I do."

Levi scoffs. "Everything to you just a gamble?"

Serene blue eyes glance at him. "Not everything."

"The two officers?"

"Possibly deserters. Possibly dead."

"You haven't decided."

"I have. You'll be the first to know should the evidence support my theory."

The implicit level of trust in his words causes Levi to grimace. He stops the conversation. 

Heavy silence falls over the interior. Levi feels a sudden urge to ask again. 

"What do you want from me?" 

It's a long moment before Erwin answers. 

"Nothing."

His answer had changed. 

"Nothing," Levi repeats.

"I don't plan to change anything about this. Being here right now is enough for me. ...Is that an acceptable answer for you?"

"How the hell should I know?" 

Erwin smiles gently at him. Aside from when they were in bed, he was always gentle with him.

 

Erwin pulls the BMW into park and shuts off the engine. Impassive blue eyes look past him to observe the flat hidden beyond the gate. Levi remains undecided for a moment, hesitating. Erwin slowly reaches out, and with the back of his hand, briefly touches his face.

"Are you happy, Levi?"

Levi vaguely recalls him asking that question before, but can't seem to remember the circumstances behind it. 

Why couldn't he remember?

Erwin's face changes slightly in response to his silence. He leans forward, resting his forehead against his.

"I have to go," he whispers. "I won't be coming in without a housewarming gift."

"Suit yourself."

"Give me until the end of this week."

Levi gazes up at him, resigned. Erwin looked as if he was holding back his words again, but the moment was gone just as fast as it'd appeared.

"Until then, Levi."

"... Yeah."

Levi pulls away and gets out. He watches as the M5 gradually disappears into the distance, suddenly very much aware that he was alone again.

He returns to the apartment to find a plastic bag hanging outside his door. Weighing down the bottom were two red beets and the old woman's number.

"You flirting with me, old bag?" he mutters to himself, examining the condition of the frost-hardy root. One was smaller than the other.

He takes them inside.

 

 

Erwin is with him on the full-sized bed, arm woven tightly around his upper torso. 

Levi slowly sits up.

"What's wrong?"

With the mattress oriented against the window frame, he's able to spot the white-covered landscape in the darkness.

"It's snowing."

Erwin's lips part slightly as he twists his neck. "It's late into the spring for snow." 

"Shit gets everywhere."

"Yes, but it's quite beautiful... even if the cold runs deep."

Levi looks sharply at him. Erwin was talking in riddles again, alluding to him. The blonde ends of his hair laid every which way on the pillow, his blue eyes pensive, bright from the open skies. Both of them knew the gun Levi kept underneath was centimeters from his skull, but neither had made the move to address that it was there.

"This bed barely fits us," he observes in a low voice, watching Erwin.

Erwin sits up and mouths over the back of his neck, "I can lie over you if you'd prefer."

The hairs of Levi's skin stand on edge. He sinks his elbow into his side. Erwin grunts softly and flops back down with a smile.

"You're an unbelievable bastard." 

Erwin's fingers slowly graze the ends of his hair. Levi lowers his gaze, feeling his chest tighten at the way Erwin watched him with such peace and adoration. Snow falls for the remainder of the night. It's the first time in this bed that he sleeps without the aide of drugs.

 

Erwin eventually does spend the morning lying over him. 

 

Levi wakes afterwards at precisely five o'clock. He was on the opposite schedule and needed to use the last day to readjust. Calm blue eyes slowly open as he gets up and dresses. When Erwin makes no move to follow, he mutters, "You need to be alone to take a sweet-ass dump or something?"

"That's very considerate of you, but no," he answers with a quiet laugh.

Levi starts clearing the dried dishes in the small kitchen. Erwin deftly cuts the vegetables beside him with a knife, as he washes each one and hands them off to him from the sink. The steady sound of the water reminds him for some reason of Hange's conversation. Erwin had most likely been a good husband and probably would have made a good father. What was he doing here with him?

"If you know how to do all this, why the hell do you keep your fridge empty?"

"It's too much effort if it's just me."

"Tch." Levi turns off the water and unrolls his sleeves. Erwin slows the knife, but doesn't look up.

"You're a very kind person."

"Pay attention to what you're doing."

He catches the wistful upturn of the corner of his lips before it disappears.

"May I ask why you have so many beets?"

 

Levi returns to the precinct the following night. His desk phone rings within the first few hours of his arrival. It was an unfamiliar number, starting with the city's area code.

"Captain Ackerman, my name is Marie-"

"I know who you are. You shouldn't call here," he cuts off in a low voice.

"Please don't hang up. It's about Erwin," she begs.

Levi's hand tightens around the receiver. The undercurrent of distress in her voice causes the blood to start pounding in his ears.

"Captain, Nile and I can't get a hold of him. He was supposed to meet us for dinner two hours ago. Please. I don't know where or who else to call at this point aside from you. I know higher ranked officers usually don't-"

"I'll call you back."

He memorizes the number and hangs up.


	10. Levi's Rising

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please note the change in warnings.

I adore you, you stupid bastard. I never wanted to die. Even if you hadn't realized your dream, mine was to always be with you.

 

 

 

Levi rises from his desk and dials 0.

“Yes, sir?” the operator answers immediately.

“Where is Lieutenant Zoe?” 

“One moment please.” 

A pause on the line.

“Captain, she’s in the financial district. Shall I patch you through?” 

“No.”

He hangs up. 

Levi didn’t have time to wait for her. He orders Petra to follow him. Eld and Marist had been sent out on a separate assignment earlier that night. 

"I received a tip about a possible missing person. Be alert for multiple scenarios on location,” he tells her in the car, eyeing her professional civilian wear.

"Is this an exercise, sir?" she asks, unsure why they were tasked with an entry level officer's job.

"No."

He flashes his badge and the security guard waves them through. They ascend the elevator.

Petra blinks in confusion when he takes out his copy of Erwin's key and jams it into the lock, but gets into position, tightening her grip on the firearm.

They enter the apartment. Blood was spattered all over the foyer and living room floor, trailing right up to the front door. Erwin was nowhere in site. Petra rapidly moves ahead down the halls.

A dark body lay in the middle of the living room, and Levi steadily approaches, firearm pointed. It was Kit. The balcony door was open. He quickly sweeps the area.

"Clear!" Petra calls.

Levi steps over the dog and tucks away his firearm, kneeling over the body to check his vitals.

There was a bloody sleeve in Kit's mouth. They had the DNA of the intruder. "Good boy," he murmurs. 

He keeps his expression stoic as he stands, his pulse pounding in his ears. Where was Erwin? He moves down the hall towards the bedroom closet, entering the code of the safe. The gun was missing, but all essential documents were still inside. Erwin, wherever he was, was armed. Petra watches him stare down at Kit's body and goes to stand by his side.

"Captain... I'm sorry," she whispers. "You... you knew the person living here?"

He looks directly at her. "This is Erwin Smith's apartment."

Her eyes widen in shock and she looks around, as if seeing the space for the first time. Levi finds both sets of car keys in a drawer. He pauses in the doorway of the office, looking at the whiskey glass on the desk. Erwin's lips had stained the rim. There were two centimeters left, an oddity.

"Captain, your orders?"

He doesn't answer. Erwin's laptop and briefcase were still there. He taps the passcode.

1-2-2-4

The screen comes to life. 

"Sir?" she asks again, voice shakier.

"If you were him, who would be after you?" he asks slowly, reading the contents of the screen.

A pause. "Someone working for Rod Reiss."

"I need you to go back to the precinct and stand guard on Reiss."

"Sir." She straightens. "Where will you be going?"

"I'll be taking action separately from you this time. Report directly to Lieutenant Zoe, trust no one else."

He picks up the office line and dials 110. "I live on the 40th floor of Roppongi Residential Tower 2. There are gunshots being fired." He hangs up immediately.

"Go," he tells Petra, "Don't be alarmed if you don't hear from me."

Levi deletes the contents of the screen and puts the computer back to sleep. He glances at Kit one last time, grimacing slightly before moving to the basement level alone. 

Both of Erwin's cars were still on site. He eyes the black Mercedes parked across from Erwin's Lexus. It had never moved once out of its parking spot his entire stay here. A faint layer of dust had collected on the windshield. He takes out a knife.

 

 

Even while undercover, Levi had never driven over 200 km/h. He yanks the keys out of the car and pushes past the gate.

Erwin was half sitting with the door open, bloodied and holding his side in a car he didn't recognize.

"You're bleeding."

Blood was soaked into the back of the carseat and he reveals the wound underneath his hand.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't risk going to a hospital. They're looking for this."

He reveals a flash drive in his other hand, pale, hollowed eyes falling on him.

"Wait here."

Levi runs upstairs and raps on the door. The elderly woman answers.

"I need your help."

She blinks a few times in surprise and he holds up his badge in response, deadly expression unchanging.

Levi sits by Erwin and watches as the retired nurse bandages him, rage, guilt, and relief surfacing in turns within him. He should have stayed with him, should have been there, should have killed them. Kit had probably saved his life. The bullet had narrowly missed his vital organs, grazing his side instead and leaving a seven centimeter gash below his ribcage.

'They pulled security footage of the missing police officers entering the building. Bertolt's blood was in the dog's mouth - positive ID. Assume both are informants. They will be going to the press soon with Erwin's disappearance. Zoe is covering your absence. You have five hours, please return safely,' Petra texts.

'Good work. Await further instructions,' he replies.

So Hange didn't trust the commissioner either. He would have to take Erwin to a place no one would find him.

Levi first disposes of Erwin's stolen car. When he returns, he tosses Erwin's phone onto the ground and slam his foot over it to break it.

"Where did you take the car?"

"Don't worry about it."

Levi changes the plates of the Mercedes, arms himself, and helps Erwin into the vehicle. They drive northeast.

"Where are we going?"

"A black site."

"Is it in use?"

"It hasn't been since I was pulled. You still haven't told me how you escaped."

"I was in my office when they entered through the balcony. Kit took down Bertolt first. The fact that they weren't expecting him probably saved my life. I got the gun and shot Reiner clear in the back before he killed Kit, but he was still standing when I fled. I then took the service car from the basement."

Reiner must have had on a bulletproof vest.

"How did you know I'd be the first to find you?"

Erwin had typed very clearly: go home, l.

"Do you believe in past lives?"

"What?"

Erwin sometimes asked strange, rather inopportune questions. It was a product of his intelligence Levi supposes. He smiles joylessly at his wry expression.

"No then?"

"I don't think about these things, especially not now. Why?"

Erwin's piercing gaze holds him, as if looking right through him, before turning back to the road.

"It's nothing. Will you keep this safe?"

He hands him the flash drive.

"You're using this to prosecute Reiss."

"Yes, and his direct subordinates. Dimo Reeves sent it this afternoon."

"All right."

 

Eighty minutes later, they arrive at an abandoned waterfront house, boarded up on the first floor.

Erwin groans slightly when he helps him into the house. He sets him down on the sofa and fetches water and sedatives from the medicine cabinet.

"Swallow this."

Levi brings the glass to his lips. Erwin was clearly still in pain. He couldn't do anything but distract him. He kneels on the sofa facing him and kisses him. Erwin sighs into his mouth a bit, his breath shaky. He deepens it, emptying his emotions into him, fisting the back of his hair. He pulls away eventually and stares down at Erwin's wound.

"I love you," Erwin confesses.

Levi freezes, keeping his eyes downcast. He sits back slowly on his heels.

Erwin reaches out to tenderly touch his face. "Levi..."

"Stop moving, you'll reopen the wound."

Levi grips his hand and lowers it, their fingers still together on his knees.

"I once had a dream you died before I could tell you." He leans his head back on rest and closes his eyes. "So now you know," he breathes rigidly.

"I'm here, aren't I?" Levi lifts his eyes to study his pained expression. He lowers his voice to a mere murmur. "Aren't you going hear my answer?"

Hazy blue eyes focus on him. It was the most vulnerable he'd ever seen Erwin. 

"I don't know if I can live up to your expectations. I can't give you all the things your wife did, but I'm not going to fight this anymore, so just accept that this is all I have to offer."

"When have I ever told you this wasn't enough?" He closes his hand around his fingers, searching his face. "Can't you see how happy you make me?"

"Truthfully, no. Look at where we are now."

Erwin smiles ruefully. "I was the one who asked to run away."

"You're a moron, that's why."

"Am I?"

"Yeah." He leans closer. "Which makes me an even bigger one for listening to you."

"That's too bad." Their lips meet.

They shower together. Levi had taped gauze and waterproof bandaging over his wound. He sits nude next to him on the edge of the bed as the drugs start to take effect. Erwin runs his knuckles over his thigh in a slow back and forth pattern. He wanted Erwin, wanted to climb over his long body and feel every part of him underneath him. He wanted to lay asleep next to him, watch over him, but he had to go back.

"Sleep," he whispers. "I'll be back in a few hours."

Levi leaves preserved cans on the kitchen counter and bolts the door, leaving a gun beside him on the nightstand.

 

 

There was one sure way to divert their attention away from Erwin. He turns the flash drive in circles in his palm. If this was what they wanted, they could have it.

He stops at a coffee shop on his way back to the city, donning a black baseball cap as he exits the car. The sun was starting to rise now. Levi goes to one of the public computers in the back. Opening the contents, he views each file and uploads them all at once onto a data sharing site. He swiftly pockets it again.

'What's the excuse you made up for me?' he texts Hange.

'Family emergency,' she replies immediately. 'I knew you would find him.'

"Tch," he mutters.

'I have a gift for you.'

There was enough evidence to perform a tactical raid on the rest of his men at this point. Hange's reply comes twenty minutes later.

'Gear up when you return. We're going in.'

 

 

Two months later...

Levi stands at the Shadis family plot, staring down at Keith's gravestone. His eyes wander to Kit's newly marked, unweathered slab. Erwin had requested that he be buried next to the commissioner. He had been given full honors, a police officer's funeral. 

Levi kneels and puts down a lint roller beside his collar.

"Hey, mutt," he greets. "Give this to your new owner for me. They'll need it."

He felt a semblance of closure that Reiner had been killed immediately in the raid. Bertolt had survived, despite sustaining heavy injuries. He was currently awaiting the death sentence with Reiss and two additional subordinates. 

Gunther and Oluo still stood watch over Annie.

Not a month after, Erwin had decided to take the job up north. Levi had met Marie during his transition then and it had been uncomfortable, but bearable.

He meets Hange at the station. She had items from Mike to give to Erwin.

"I'll see you, Monday... your very last Monday," she laughs.

He smiles in response, ever so slightly.

 

 

The distant sound of a low horn wakes him and he stirs.

They were lying on the sofa together, Levi sprawled out over Erwin's body. He looks up slowly, resting his chin on his chest.

Erwin's blue eyes, bright with affection, were there to greet him.

"You're awake."

"Yes."

His gaze moves behind Erwin to the ship passing on the horizon from the large bay window. He lays the side of his head back down, eyes wandering the clean, contemporary lines of the house.

"Did you sleep well?" Erwin murmurs against his hair, playing with the ends on the back of his neck.

Levi hums in response, too comfortable to move.

"This house is a bit much for you."

"You don't like it?"

"... It's a lot to look after."

He was referring to the security of it more so than the maintenance.

"It's all right. I have you to fill up all the spaces too."

"Who said I wanted to live with you?"

Erwin grinds his hips up, making him groan lightly in response.

"You did, apparently."

"... Yeah, I seem to recall that." He slowly sits up and straddles his hips.

"Not tired anymore?" Erwin drawls, languidly thumbing his hip bone.

"No," he replies, peeling his shirt over his head.

 

 

Erwin is still moving inside of him on the bed when the rain starts pelting the windows, breaking the darkness.

He fists the sheets and moans quietly.

Erwin marks his neck and throat, making him squirm and shudder as the cold air hits the areas left by his tongue.

"Erwin..."

Levi's breath hitches when he finally pulls out, feeling his come run down the inside of his thighs. Erwin lies beside him and keeps their faces close, sliding a large hand up his back. Levi watches him as their breaths slow, giving into the intimacy of the moment, choosing to stay still as Erwin touches his face. He would never have a connection with anyone like this, he was sure of it now. 

"What are you thinking about?" Erwin asks.

He doesn't answer at first, remembering that this was what he'd dreamed about. He couldn't recall it anymore, but the feeling of it then... the feeling of it remained the same.

"This."

Erwin searches his eyes, inquiring him to continue.

"This is what I want."

Erwin moves closer, voice dropping lower. "Because you love me?" It was more of a statement than a question.

"... Yeah," he whispers, barely audible.

Erwin brings his hand up and kisses his ring finger. 

"Then my dreams have been realized too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading.


End file.
